The Ambercrombie and Fitch problem.

So I'm going to assume we've all heard about the bullshit the CEO/whatever from AF has said about fat people.

Now first let's understand that this is not shocking. It's not new. It's not a surprise at all. If you have seen any of their adverts, their products etc you'd be pretty fully aware that they are a no fat people store.

Via facebook I saw that there is an Occupy AF thing going on and I have so many problems with this I couldn't fit it all into a facebook comment.

Buckle your seatbelts.

From the facebook page:

>We can't change their business practices, and we can't (and don't want to) force them to make larger sizes. We CAN let them know that bullying is unacceptable, and we CAN change the rarified atmosphere in their store.
This is NOT a "protest". Please do not bring signs, signs, or chant. Just go to Abercrombie and Fitch with as many large, unpopular, or possibly just level-headed people that you know, and shop. Try things on that don't fit. Don't buy anything. Just make the store a place filled with the people that they don't want there.

This one day is just a beginning, a symbol. Every time you are in the mall, go in the store. Don't buy anything, just be there to make sure that their goal of their store being filled with only thin and beautiful people is thwarted. Make it an unpleasant place for the "cool" and "beautiful" kids to shop.

Also from the page:

Remember: This is NOT a "protest". No signs, no chanting, no destruction of property (though if you own A&F clothing that you want to "alter" and wear, feel free). Just browse (but don't buy). Fill the store with people that they don't want there, making it unpleasant for the people they DO want there.

 My first problem with this sort of thing is that the action is directed to the wrong people.

Let's make this perfectly clear.

I do not care where other people with bodies different from mine shop. As I've discussed where and how people shop is not always a tacit agreement about a companies business model, it's not always about being cool and pretty, nor is it always a cut and dried decision. I just posted about that here.

I cannot support the idea that making the consumers of a product feel badly about their purchases or as the about statement says, make them uncomfortable is reasonable or okay.

As I say over and over again, unless you are coming out of pocket to pay for other peoples clothing, food, shelter, cars etc. It's really not your place or business to bother them about it.

Moving along.

Let's talk about being a retail employee shall we?

As we all know being poor or jobless really sucks. It is a rarified privilege to really have the option of saying, no I don't want this job because the CEO is a dick.

Most retail (especially in chain stores) employees make minimum wage and most are part time without medical insurance.

Let's have a quick look at minimum wage. Currently the federally mandated minimum wage is 7.25$ an hour.

Before taxes if you worked a full 40 hour work week you would make, 290$ a week.

When contrasted with a multi millionare boss and customers who can afford to shop in a store at full price, what effect does making those people uncomfortable have?

Let's see.

Having a planned action in a store even if it is supposed to be not a protest means that those people (who are presumably poor especially if they are adults who are not supported by parents or spouses) more stressed out. Working retail, especially in a store that people at large have a problem with sucks. Add in the stress of poverty and then a bunch of people intentionally wanting to fuck up your day and it's really not great.

Salespeople in retail stores have the least amount of power in the structure of retail.

Why focus the energy on people who have no power to change anything?

Why put the onus of change on people who often if they do become a squeaky wheel will lose their jobs?

Would the people who plan to occupy AF give those people jobs if they lose them? :Make them feel better if at the next store meeting they get berated for "not doing something" about the situation?

I worked retail and I remember things like this happening on a small scale. There was a lot of pressure to not let it happen but no real power to do so.

Yes, people working there have chosen to work there but, when you need to feed and clothe yourself or support your family, money comes first for a lot of people.

Not everyone has the privilege of letting their own personal ethics dictate every choice they make.

I felt the same way when people wanted to occupy target stores.

No one has ever given me a good answer as to why it is that these type of things always focus on the people with the least amount of pull. Or told me how those people are supposed to create a change in a company they don't own and have no influence as to how it is run.

If the point is to just be irritating and potentially cause employee stress, it's a good plan.

If there is a desire to make some change and awareness among the people who can make a difference there are other annoying things to do.

For instance.

If you click here you can see an array of means of contacting AF. If you want to make them uncomfortable it is very simple to spend a little while writing a short form style email. Have all of the people you want to occupy, send the same message. Every day at the same time. Every. Day. Spread the message on facebook, message boards and other social media and ask people to join in.

Read their diversity statement and ask pointed questions about it. Every. Day. If you get a response, CC EVERYONE you can think of and share the information you get.

Also at the end of everything, there is not a lot anyone can do to change that mans mind or his policies. There is merit in watching to see if they violate their own or state or federal policies  Call the right people about that. Remind them of every misstep if they violate those policies.

Basically don't screw with the people with the least power.

Let me say it again.

Regardless of your personal ability to decide where you work, how and where you spend your money etc based strictly on your idea of ethics and morality that's awesome. Get it. Do it.

However, do remember that not everyone is in that position and it is patently unfair and frankly a jerk move to harass, bother or make the rest of us uncomfortable.

Also in case you don't already know, I think that the CEO of AF is a fucking asshole. Very typical sizeist, classist rich White dude douchebag. I hope he has the eternal fiery shits. I hope he gets the shits so bad he needs an anal retread.

I don't care what he looks like, and yes if part of your issue with him is his looks please stop. Not an okay thing. I do care that he's a douchebag.

I am very into the idea of letting the horrified public make sure he knows how much of a douchebag we think he is.

I'm not okay with doing the same to the people who work at his company. Especially the ones on the bottom.

Homo Out.

The Ambercrombie and Fitch problem.

On Subversion and White Women.

Every few months or so some company (most recently Dove) or lady rag (Glamour, Cosmo whomever) decides that they are going to be the Captain Save A Hos of the universe. Last year I talked about Lady Gaga being the face of a new body love revolution and why it pissed me off.

Right now I've read about ten to fifteen articles around the internet where Thin Pretty White Ladies are extolling the virtues of body love and acceptance in the form of pointing out their "flaws" and using the language of self help books everywhere. LOOK AT ME I HAVE A FAT ON MY ASS AND I OVERCAME.

Etc. Etc. You've seen it.

I remain unimpressed.

I've seen a lot of arty farty things on tumblr and elsewhere that use the language of subverting the dominance of the Thin Pretty White Lady with more Thin Pretty White Ladies, but maybe they don't  have on obvious make up or they are making stupid faces.

WOOHOO...

or not.

Here's the thing.

Subversion at it's root is not just putting an "ugly" face on the predominant beauties and calling it done.

In this context all that does is frankly piss off a lot of people who are in actuality, just by walking around in the world with their heads up are walking talking subversion.

In FA we have the same problem.

The hourglass beautiful White lady with big tits, a big booty and killer clothes is the Optimal Fatty.

Honestly, a lot of those people who are heralded in FA circles aren't saying anything all that deep beyond You Go Girl style feminism.

On one hand yes it's nice to see a glamourous fat person doing some glam things but, at what point do we start saying okay this is not really doing it and this person does not represent us or me at all.

My problem with this phenomenon in both FA specifically and in the world at large revolves around the absolute fact that I am not and never will be close to the Thin White Lady ideal.

I won't.

Most of you won't.

Furthermore, those of us who are far away from that idea have been doing this work for a long time. I am not here for people who whether willfully or not steal my work and the work of people like me.

I am not okay with the Thin Pretty White Ladies leading the charge against discrimination that let's face it, in the US they don't experience on a wide scale.

If we take the example of the Thin Pretty White Lady and her bit of fat on her ass, let's put her in the world of a fat person.

This is touching again on the differences between interpersonal problems (name calling, body policing etc) and institutional bias.

In this context I would like to know if that jiggly saddlebag on the thigh or the small protuberance of a bloated belly has ever caused this Thin Pretty White Lady to be denied, flat out denied basic medical care?

Generally speaking, that doesn't happen.

As I pointed out in the follow up to the interpersonal vs industrial yes it can happen but it is not the norm.

The fact is that what these (most often, and used loosely per usual) women are fighting is not in fact the soul crushing, life destroying status quo.

Most often they want how pretty and awesome they are to be reinforced.

That has nothing to do with getting me, or other fat marginalized people the things that matter. No I dont' give a fuck about Abercrombie not serving the plus size market. We KNOW they don't, have y'all looked at their websites and choices of models? come on now.

The Thin Pretty White Lady LOOK HOW PRETTY WE ARE AND WE TOTALLY DON'T GIVE A FUCK body acceptance is not what the rest of us need.

What we need is to destroy the Thin Pretty White Lady Ideal as an aspirational goal.

We need access to the basic health care that many of us pay for out of pocket, so we can live the best lives we can.

We need for those who do cater to plus size customers in terms of clothing to understand that no we don't want the worst multi animal print muumuu they can come up with. We want choices that range from couture to 19.99 pants.

We need for those Thin Pretty White ladies to yell as loud when it comes to how we are treated as they expect for us to yell about how they are treated.

We need for the Thin Pretty White Ladies to instead of taking the mic and running with it to say, hey these people know their shit listen to them.

We need for the people who believe themselves to be bucking the system by feeding us images of the current acceptable ideas of beauty and personhood to shut the entire fuck up.

We need to stand up for ourselves and our voices.

We need to not just accept the rah rah look how pretty someone is and understand that while it might feel good (if you fall into the closer to the Thin Pretty White lady Ideal than not) for a minute, it's not sustaining.

We need to look at ourselves and say, does this serve my needs?

What is my solution?

Fuck pretty. Fuck rah rah lady rag articles. Fuck Thin (or not so thin) Pretty White Ladies being the face of my needs.

I walk around in this fat Black body that is often loathed and desired, I walk around with my head up and I survive. I come here and i write stuff. I support my friends of Color and my Queers and the people whose voices tend to be drowned out in the noise of the misplaced authority of the Pretty White Ladies.

On the small scale I wear whatever the fuck I want.

I take damn fine care of myself as I can because I have to.

I survive.

My survival and the fact that I am talking to you right now is a big ole middle finger to a world that tells me constantly from all angles that I am not only not good enough but that I will never be good enough.

I open my big mouth and I talk. Or I use my silence as a weapon.

So no I'm not excited when I see a lot of the buzz or hype around acceptance because it's not for me, it's not for you and that's fucking bullshit.

Homo Out.

On Subversion and White Women.

When your beauty routine fights back. AVEENO® POSITIVELY RADIANT® Intensive Night Cream

Okay darlings. This is going to be part review and part how to recover tale.

This entry brought to you in part by Influenster. I was sent the AVEENO® POSITIVELY RADIANT Intensive Night cream for free to review.

Check out some other reviews here.

Product Blurb from Aveeno:

The AVEENO® POSITIVELY RADIANT® Intensive Night Cream, formulated with ACTIVE NATURALS® Total Soy Complex and vitamin B3, helps to reduce the appearance of discoloration, uneven tone and blotchiness, revealing healthier-looking skin.

To start with let me detail what products I use regularly.

From the fine company One Hand Washes the Other. I use Black Magic facial soap. I have been using this as a cleanser for about two years now and I must say that my skin is consistently clearer than it has been since puberty.

At night I use (so expensive my God) Korres Wild Rose + Vitamin C night time facial cream. If you recall I bought it for myself as a present in January. I still have quite a bit so I'm not as upset about the price as I had been. Also, the stuff is freaking gold. Smells and behaves luxuriously. Worth it.

During the day I wash my face with cold water in the morning, I use one of several BB creams, MUFE mat velvet foundation and whatever powder is in arms reach.

So I opened up the Influenster box and was delighted to see the moisturizer. First impressions:

Nice light scent. Not as heady as my Korres but reasonable and dissipated quickly.

Very nice light but creamy texture.

The first time I used it I only used it on one cheek. I thought if I were going to have  reaction it would be immediate. After the first night things looked good. No itching, no redness, no apparent upset. I waited a full 48 hours and nothing so I started using it as I would use my regular night cream.

Within about four days my face broke out in epic proportions.

I have had acne prone, oily sensitive skin since puberty (more than 20 years to quantify it) and wow.

Honestly my face broke out worse than it has in years at this point.

I immediately stopped using the Aveeno and started the recovery effort.

Of course now it occurs to me I should have taken pictures but honestly I was just too upset to think of that. My cheeks and forehead were absolutely covered with painful bumps from very small to medium sized, some had whiteheads some didn't.

It was awful.

Here is how I set about recovering.

First thing, if you have a serious skin reaction do not go crazy on it and throw ALL THE PRODUCTS on it. That could make it worse.

I stopped using my Clarisonic and used just my hands and my black magic to remove my make up and cleanse my skin. I also alternated using a drying lotion (which I will review later) and heavy moisture because my face was drying out in spots.

I also made a serious effort to be extra hydrated. Lots of water.

I skipped using any facial masks etc and just kept up with gentle but thorough cleansing, lots of water and keeping my skin moist.

After about another week and a half or so my face is almost as clear as it was prior to this mishap.

I am pretty adventurous when it comes to new products and sometimes this happens. The thing to remember is that being gentle is your friend, don't put ALL the zit clearing things on your face at once and listen to your skin.

Now for my thrifty and frugal friends here is a protip.

When a moisturizer or face wash doesn't work out for your face don't toss it.

I've found that often what breaks out my face is good for other things. This time of year the skin on my body is dreadfully dry. That Aveeno moisturizer that broke out my face is actually really nice on my dry feets. I also use it on my knees and elbows. No itching no problems.

For facial cleansers, I keep them around and use them on my make up brushes. Especially my foundation brush. It's important to keep your face brushes clean to avoid bacteria caused breakouts.

So the moral is sometimes crap happens and your skin may freak out.

You can fix it with patient love and gentle attentions.

Also, don't toss away stuff that doesn't work for your face because you might get other uses out of it.

Again, this post brought to you by Influenster and I was sent this product for free to review.

If you'd like to be an influenster drop me a note as I still have a few invites left.

When your beauty routine fights back. AVEENO® POSITIVELY RADIANT® Intensive Night Cream