Sunday, March 21, 2004

I feel much better today. I had such a day on Friday it wasn't even funny. But now weee look I'm all better. Well not entirely all better but I did have pie so that makes up for a bunch.

I also did something out of character for me. I went to a journalling site and posted an anonymous letter to a friend that I had a falling out with sometime ago. I can be pretty chicken shit when it comes to things like that. And I'm pretty positive she hates me now. Even though it was an enourmous misunderstanding.

It makes me so sad when things like that happens. I love this woman dearly and miss having her as a friend so much it's a raw place in my heart. I was really hurt when she lashed out at me. Deeply terribly hurt. But I did forgive her. And unlike with most people if she contacted me this very moment I'd welcome her with open arms and want to work things out.

What makes it all the worst is that it was all a big fucking misunderstanding. Her seeing things that just were not there and acting on them. Over a man.

Yes. Over a man.

I have never in my life been one of those women who will bust up friendships over some guy. Because most are just that. Just some dude. Or chick for that matter. The point is that sex and romance tends to come and go. But good friends are what you really need in life. Or maybe that's just me.

I don't know

Fuck now I want to cry again.

You know sometimes it really sucks being a girl.

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