Thursday, June 23, 2005

Ever feel like the absolute tedium of your life is going to choke you out?

I find myself obsessively reading whatever ezine or something I can find. Staring out at the security monitor for the glimpses of wet and wind. This is window envy. I work in an area surrounded by 20 computer monitors and twice as many processors. Not to mention the Death Star giant black shelf thing that serves as a desk. Ugly carpet. Shitty chair that makes my fucking back hurt.

The DAY I find a chair that I can sit in here for the length of time my job requires and I don't leave here stiff and cranky will be the day I lick the Deathstar like a giant popsicle.

So yeah no not gonna happen.

So I soothe myself with music, tea. Frequent trips to the bathroom, outside, downstairs. Whatever to break up the utter bleakness that is my work day.

Honestly it's not the job itself but all the other bullshit that goes along with it. Including the demoralizing knowledge that the world could fall down outside and I'd only know if I turned my head at the right moment to see it on the security screens.

Got an email from a fellow author and friend who I haven't spoken to in quite awhile. That was nice even though I'm a couple of weeks tardy answering it. Ugh.

I've been rolling myself back into the habit of jotting down whatever it is that floats through my mind. I have discovered that what I really need is a laptop. I type much faster than I handwrite. And I can read my typing later on when I want to look as opposed to my handwriting which looks like I gave a purple pen to an epileptic rooster and said have at it.

this story is one of the better ones I've read recently. Go read it, it'll make you giggle.

What was I saying? Yes I am going to try and save up for a laptop. Even a chunky older one would be fine as long as I have space to store some word docs on it that'll do me just fine.

What else what else?

Goddamn I started this fucker yesterday and forgot about it when the phone started ringing.

Fuck sake.

So on with today. I spent an obscene amount of time reading The Artist Formerly Known as Hertzan Chimera's (that was a fucking mouthfull) website. Good reading you do it too.

That kids is peer pressure.

So I've been at work since 11 5 hours and counting. Just about 4 more until I can go home.

I got a bit cranky around 3-ish and went to the store for food. got myself a nice container of General Tso's chicken and some Inari. Inari is desert. I had a couple of pieces but it's a tad disappointing. Meh.

It really -really- sucks that it's so damn nice out and I'm stuck here still sans windows. I keep looking forlornly at the security monitor thinking I might get a faux ray of grainy black and white sunshine.

Gods I'm a fuckin downer.

Being here makes me depressed and tired.

Welcome to my life.

And I think I'm done. Really nobody needs to hear me whine about how sucky things are. Because we all know, things suck. Suck large stinky goaty smelling balls.

Yep time to go. Goodnight Sally.

1 comment:

Mike Philbin said...

nice one, nudiemuse

what was your favourite gruesome tale?

anyway, I've added your blog to my list of blogs.


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