Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Bouncing boobies and glee.

So my next large purchase is going to be a good bra. To most that doesn't sound like such a big deal. But, when you're working with the big heavy D cups and want to do something as booby bounce inducing belly dancing. You need a good bra.

It's fairly astounding what a good bra can do for an outfit. So yes. I have several earmarked for further research. If I'm going to spend upwards of 40$ on a titty holder it better be fucking good and comfortable.

I'm also shopping for a new cell phone. Not really excited about that to be honest. I use prepaid service to save money because I don't really use my phone that often but, I do need one since I can't wear watches and like to be able to call home if I'm going to be really delayed so One Hung Low doesn't worry.

I'm looking at this phone. And I think I like it. However I am vastly unimpressed with T-Mobile's customer service. I cannot get a straight answer to a simple question so I will probably just buy one off of Ebay.

Something new and odd. I've started eating breakfast. Which is strange because I've never been a real big fan of the breakfast. Lately I've been eating a little something when I get to work, take half my vitamins then I eat lunch later. Seems to be working out pretty well. I"ve become fairly good at spacing vitamins/food so I don't find myself suddenly with the low blood sugar pissed offness.

I am seriously book lusting right now.

I need these books:

The Butcher Boy. If the reviews and reccomendations I've gotten are to be believed I would probably really enjoy this book. I could do with reading the madness rather than actually going there myself right now.

Speaking of books I find it inordinately amusing when whatever I'm reading makes people make a face like they've been stuck in the asshole with a hot poker.

Last night I was rereading "Plainclothes Naked" because I forgot to put the Gogol back in my bag and this lady was craning and contorting herself to get a gander at what I was reading. She looked at the cover (see it below) and her face puckered up right quick and she even made a disgusted noise.

As far as book covers go that one is not nearly as potentially offensive as many others I own. Maybe it was the word naked in the title that did it, or she knows who Jerry Stahl is and hates him. I don't care it still made me laugh.

What I enjoy even more is when some "wonderful" person decides to confront me about my choice of reading materials. Gods I can be nasty about that sort of thing. For instance when a woman got all huffy about me reading Real Live Nude Girls=: Chronicles of a Sex Positive Culture by Carol Queen. Her entire point was that a.)I was reading pornography in public and that b.) that was somehow "asking" for something to happen.

You can imagine my reaction.

I calmly and politely explained to the dimwit that I was not inf act reading pornography but a series of essays that are better classified as creative non-fiction about sexuality etc. And if she was well versed enough with pornography maybe she should stick to her own and not that which does not belong to her. I didn't even address the "asking for it" issue. The look I gave her made my thoughts clear.

She sniffed and snorted in a huff until the bus came. I continued reading my book.

And I know everyone is wondering is the pants ban still in effect?

It certainly is. I'm wearing black mary janes, black tights, a black asymetrical hem skirt, black beater style tank, long sweater cardigan thing. And some chartreuse eyeshadow. That I am still undecided on.

I am also wearing some supposedly long last lipgloss that did not last at all and I am annoyed. Yet another reason to switch to lipstain.

And I think I'm spent. I have really bad cramps and need to find my Midol before I reach in and yank my uterus out through my cervix.

Homo Out.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Gogol makes me think crazy.

I started reading some Gogol on Friday on my way home from work. I purchased the Dover Thrift edition of Diary of a Madman and Other Stories and it was well worth the four dollars it cost me. It's was a virgin book.

Very tasty.

This article about the long mourned magazine Sassy is great. I loved Sassy when I was just a lil baby beasty. I was probably a little younger than their target demographic but still it made me a happy lil camper. I remember making some of their DIY projects before I knew what the fuck DIY stood for, and for the record. I fucking hated Courtney Love then and still do.

Anyone who makes their name on sheer skank factor pisses me the fuck off.

If these bitches are famous why am I not?

Before I start frothing about jack asses who's sole reason for being famous and/or rich has to do with birth and ick let me move on.

Speaking of Nerve does anyone aside from me remember the amazingly HOT spread of Mia Tyler that was in that a few years back? My God that girl. Luscious like hot damn I wanna take a bite of that ass. Mmm yeah.

While on the subject of juicy I just ate another pear. And I'm about to eat a banana with peach yogurt on the side. Actually not on the side, to cut down on my personal mess factor I'm chopping the banana up and dropping it into the yogurt.

So while I'm on the subject of health I realized a little earlier today that taking MSM as a supplement has been such an enormous help with the arthritis and other assorted joint pain. Unlike glucosamine it's not so damn expensive and it works fairly quickly. The reason I mention it is because I ran out between shipments last week and wow. My knees and ankles were hurting quite a bit. Being without that for almost a week made a huge difference.

Good thing I hit up the Puritan's Pride I picked myself up five bottles of MSM, two of melatonin, and two tea tree blemish treatment sticks for 25 bucks and free UPS shipping. Not bad I say.

I also feel the need to share that Ting Ting Jahe ginger candy is like fucking crack and I can't stop eating it. At this rate I'm going to shit myself later. Ginger is fabulous for your digestive tract but seriously, ingesting it in this amount is likely to induce speed guts.

Now aren't all five of you glad you read my blog?

The moratorium on pants continues. Outfit of the day is a black full length slim velvet skirt, black tights, black flats, black v-neck tunic length sweater. Didn't do much with hair or make up today.

I really should've worn boots.

I am listening to Wumpscut that makes me giggle a little because I haven't listened to them in years.

In other news, I am really annoyed that in my spate of vitamin ordering I entirely forgot about buying more hair/nail/skin formula and I neglected to remember my megaC either.

Fuck sake.


After I finish my hot ginger drink no more for the day. Otherwise I will have an accident. And there is nobody here to wipe my butt but me.

I have been introduced to a new web comic and you must look at it. I command you.

Now I think I'm spent. I have to pee and make some tea. Pu Erh is calling my name.

Homo Out.

Friday, January 26, 2007

And the girls say...

Random song lyric titles. Who doesn't love that?

Right this instant I am nibbling bits of D'anjou pear (everytime I type that I type D'anjoy). What I really need is a few bits of fancy cheese, a big glass of wine and somewhere to recline and finish reading Plainclothes Naked. Seriously.

But no I am at work and drinking hojicha tea. Listening to some strange tribal-ish dance station that is about to get changed.

OH free stuff. I got distracted digging through a pile o music memorbilia that people at work are giving away. I scored a Descendants sticker, some Southern Culture on the Skids stickers, a Blue Note Records comp, some Virgin records swag and probably going to pick up some postacrds to add to my collection too. I love that kind of shit. That is the MAIN reason I miss working in a record store. I loved getting that shit.

I was thinking earlier about my friend and mentor Daddy Liz who passed away last year. If you're new see this entry. Don't bother clicking the DX links because those are long gone now. Actually I will probably try to pull some from the way back machine for shits and giggles.

In the aftermath of a huge breakup Daddy Liz became my dream teacher. She was rough sometimes, sometimes tender but always gave me room to figure it out. She helped me not just know intellectually that it was perfectly okay to be a little high femme cock swinging mother fucker, or be the sulky cute boi wearing jeans and whitey tighties. Or any other thing I could come up with. She didn't laugh (too much anway) when I was reduced to tears because I could not figure out how to wear my cock and a garter belt, or the time I sat on her floor pouting (lip out and all)because she wouldn't let me play with her super rough LeatherDyke friends.

Which I found out later was a good idea. I wasn't ready for that then.

My big point here is that I saw a woman who looked a little like Daddy Liz on my way to work today and she told me I am beautiful and that made my day.

I miss her a lot.

In other news I really like it when straight men compliment my shoes and my make up without being greasy and/or stupid. YAY for that. I also like it when the words, super cute come out of a straight mans mouth. That makes me giggle.

The embargo on pants is still on. Today I am wearing from the feet up, burgundy knee high Docs, fishnets, black slipdress, ratty black sweater. On my face I got my Fyrinrae (I misspelled that) stuff ysterday and I'm trying out the gold pigment. It looks nice a good softish bling on the eye rather than BLING. And my fabulous Goldie lipgloss.

Love it. Now I am going to go and scour Ebay for a couple of things that might include a new webcam for FOTD (foto of the day), faux fur, black hoodies, big girl hosiery (big legs in fishnets you HEARD), and quite possibly something cute.

So yeah.

Homo Out.

PS...if one of the like four people who reads this can give me some wordpress advice I'd be much obliged. Kthnks.

PPS.. And *shimmy* in Pollyland direction.

And for Busty Rusty

Touch it bring it.... (you finish that sentance)

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Oh yeah and...

Look at the bottom of the page and go to that site. Ugly Shyla is an artist and model I like very much.

And if you want to buy me one of her tshirt dresses and/or one of her dolls feel free. Cause yeah.

I kinda wanna go see The Game at the Moore tomorrow but yeah too broke for that sorta big pimpin partying. Seriously.

Fuck sake I need to take the rest of my vitamins. And make tea so later 'mater.

(The 'mater was in reference to that cartoon movie Cars.)

Homo Out...for real this time.

The answer is 42

Also I just want to say that my pimp hand is strong.

Okay so via a community on LJ I have rediscovered a favorite place to buy panties. Because I hate wearing underwear if I"m going to wear squirrel covers they better be fucking cute and Wacky Jac fulfills that need. Not only are their drawers super cute but, they are cotton. While not glamorous cotton does keep my lady front bottom from getting really annoyed with me and showing her wrath with strange discharge and don't touch m-ness. Feel free to buy me a gift certificate. Which may or may not get you fotos of this ass in said panties. No promises.

I lurves their witchy stuff. IN fact there might be a tshirt and panty order going in soon.

My embargo on wearing pants continues. Today I am wearing a crinkled voile knee length skirt that floofs when I turn. Black semi cable tights black velvet long sleeved shirt, little thin semi crinkly-ish jacket.

Yeah I know could I be a little further back in the motherfucking batcave?

I also stopped into a local place between rushing for busses to get a cup of coffee. I've stopped in there before but hadn't really appreciated it. Ancient Grounds in downtown Seattle is an absolute gem. He serves excellent coffee (and it's local) and the atmosphere is very cool. There are all sorts of things to look at but it's not overly distracting. It smells nice and overall it's a place I could see sitting in and scribbling for awhile. When I have more time I will be going back. And the coffee cake? It is delicious and he didn't even laugh at my weird nut thing.

Okay let me explain that. I like the flavor of most kinds of nuts but, I don't like the texture. I don't like chopped up nut chunks in my food. It's not a flavor thing it's a texture thing. It's a neurosis. I also don't like chunks of anything in breads. No oaty nuggest of surprise. I really don't.

Also on the list, raisins. Ew.

I've recently started reading Warren Ellis' blog because a coworker reads it and I really enjoy it. You should read it too.

This coffee cake is so good I almost jizzed in my tights.

And since my email is being wonky I'll post this years getting to know you survey right here. Enjoy. Please save all questions until the end of the lecture thank you.

>1. FIRST NAME? Shannon
>2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Not that I'm aware of.

>4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Only when it's legible.
>10. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Sure provided I a.)weren't arthritic and old and b.) didn't die.
>11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Plain oatmeal with butter and some brown sugar.
>13. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Most of the time.
>15. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? It depends. On the stret- voice, eyes, clothes, voice. Elsewhere (aka on the interweb) vernacular.
>16. RED OR PINK? Red.

>17. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I'm crazier than I would like to be.
>18. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Myself most of the time.

>24. FAVORITE SMELLS? Roses and baby skin.
>25. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Haven't used the phone yet today. Hot dayum.

>27. FAVORITE DRINK? Without liquor coffee. With liquor Jack and Coke or Beam and Coke.
>29. HAIR COLOR? Dark brownish black.
>30. EYE COLOR? Black.

>32. FAVORITE FOOD? Currently am loving bourbon salmon.
>36. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer I'm fucking cold.
>37. HUGS OR KISSES? Both kthnks.
>38. FAVORITE DESSERT? Plain cheesecake with scotch on the side.
>41. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? Plainclothes Naked by Jerry Stahl.
>44. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? = At work some advertisement.
>46. FAVORITE SOUND? Baby/small children belly laughing. Kids speaking when they are at that age where they ALL sound like they are from Brooklyn.

>49. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Several but I'm not taking off my pants to show you.


If you read all that and STILl want to know something about me feel free to ask.

I will however neither confirm nor deny my involvement with anything involving boobs, a can of whipped cream and a pair of purple non latex gloves.

Homo Out.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007


I have the internet ADD right now so Links.

As we know I read the fabulous Monk online journo. I love the toe bondage in the second entry down it's so pretty. I wouldn't do it because I hate having my feet touched but it's purdy.

Also I want one of the Tshirts with their company logo on it. I'm not huge into bondage right now but still I like it.

I think this article is fucking stupid. No let me rephrase. I think some of the things that the CFDA is saying are fucking stupid. For instance.

-- Educate those in the industry to identify the early warning signs of eating disorders.

Are they fucking serious? Can anyone tell me with a straight face that people in the modeling industry don't already FUCKING know this shit? I dare anyone who reads this to look at any major runway show, any major fashion shoot and not count vertebrae, ribs etc. That by iteself should be a big DINGDINGDING DANGER THIS GIRL MIGHT BE UNHEALTHY sign ya think? Granted yes some people are really naturally thin however, I cannot believe that most or even a fair percentage of runway models aren't ill in some fashion.

Come on now.

What else?

Someone really needs to donate to Susie Bright's Blog then give me their Clits Up button. Actually I will probably donate my damn self next paychex as a V-Day present because, in case you haven't been playing along at home I've been ass over tea kettle in love with that woman for like ten years. No seriously. I. Love. Susie. Bright. So much so that when I emailed her this fawning fangirl letter she wrote me back AND said I could have a hug when she next comes to town. I almost wet myself in joy.

Speaking of fangirl nonsense I also had the same reaction when Jerry Stahl . I've not yet offered him a hug but I will buy him a cup of coffee. This is a very enjoyable interview with him go read it.

This is a good interview with Nick Mamatas. I also highly recommend reading the Bookslut Blog. Okay that's it I'm really done this time. Go play with the links.

Mac is lurve.

So I'm wearing my first attempt at interesting MAC make up today. I have to say that French Violet looks fucking fantastic. I just spent ten minutes looking for a photo and can't find one. What's funny is that I think MAC might be some secret sisterhood type thing. I got stopped on the street by a random cute girl because she was wearing the same pigment. She had used it wet as an eyeliner with a lighter purple on the lid. I used it on my lid then beneath my eye with a line of black on the top and this random sparkly purple I have up to my brows.

Same color, looked way different.

I really need to buy a new webcam so I can to fotos of the day without embarassment over my crapass camera.

In other news because of a recent pants related fiasco I have been wearing skirts this week. Yesterday one of my favorite full length black cotton ones with my calf length sweatercoat and underwire cami from Torrid. Today I'm wearing a black velvet dress that falls to about midcalf that I bought a couple of years ago on GothicAuction. A semi cropped black hoody with it, black tights and black mary janes.

I know..wear much black?

ANd the hair. Good lord my hair. My plan of growth is going very well. I still haven't managed much in the ways of styling just yet. I'm learning.

I get weekly tarot cards in my email (laugh and I will smite you) and part of this weeks card says the following:

The Strength card is about proving yourself by improving
your own sense of self-esteem and self-worth

Very timely I think. I've been trying very hard to be nicer to myself. It's hard. When you come from having loads of confidence to it being wibbly and fragile well, yeah. It sucks.

But I'm working on it.

I'm also going to buy myself a couple of new ponyfalls.

Mantra for the year,

"Fabulous fabulous fabulous"

In other news with the presidential nominations starting up ye GODS I have never been so thankful not to own a TV in my life. I don't want to hear all the bullshit I really don't. I'd rather find out for myself.

I think I"m spent. I'm going to listen to some internetz radio and take my vitamins.

Goodnight folks.

Homo Out.

Friday, January 19, 2007

When I grow up

I think I want to be in something like RaqsGothique. Not necessarily the moving to Oz part but, I'd do that too.

I've been obsessed with bellydancing since I was a little kid and since I was gifted with some DVD's over Christmas (Boy and Gurl Venus I love you two) I'll be able to start. I'm also making a list of other DVD's to add to my collection. WEEEE!

So yeah YAY.

And hopefully either this Spring or Summer I'll be able to take some classes. That would r0xx0r.

Since my knees etc have been better because I've added MSM as a supplement I am really looking forward to getting back in shape. I mean that very seriously. I know that's been one of the things that's contributed to my feelings of serious crap. So yeah. Bellydancing and yoga ahoy.

However I seriously need at least one good sportsbra. Getting a titty in the eye might sound good in theory but I'd rather not give myself a black eye.

I really need to pick up one of those basket tea brewing things like this one. Actually I probably will pick that up next month. Thanks to a dear friend I have some really amazing Pu Erh and hojicha loose teas and my dented dollar store tea infuser is just not cutting it. That and I use a big insulated cup and can't get enough tea into the ball to make a good strong cup.

I love hojicha brewed very strong. Makes my tastebuds happy.

Speaking of I have some of the cheapie hojicha that I bought at the grocery store in my purse.

Happily I just made my Puritans Pride order. I got myself some more MSM and am going to try taking melatonin so maybe I get some decent motherfucking sleep. And because I had a 5$ off coupon and a coupon for free shipping I also picked up a buy one get one free tea tree blemish stick because my skin dun gone CRAZY. Cold meds and my skin do not get along at all.

I'm not one to make big New Year's Resolutions but, I have promised myself that I would be gentler with myself and take better care of my body.

No, that doesn't mean I'm ready to quit smoking yet but I am ready to be nicer to myself.

Okay I'm spent. And annoyed and I don't want to talk about it.

Homo out.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

If I make it there...I'll make it anywhere.

I'm finally feeling mostly human.

My horoscope a la Free Will

Due in part to the relentless barrage of disguised brainwashing in the form of ads, news, and entertainment, most people are not themselves an average of 45 percent of the time. You, however, are currently refuting that scary statistic in style. Your percentage of being-true-to-yourself is at an all-time high, and holding steady above the 85 percent mark. Keep up the good work, Pisces. In fact, take advantage of your momentum to push for even greater authenticity. Say exactly what you mean even more. Think your own thoughts even bigger and louder. Exorcise every last one of the celebrities, entertainers, salesmen, and authorities who have demonically possessed you.

I was actually just reading the news which is something I tend not to do for long stretches of time. Mainly because enough doom and gloom, I can do that in my own head kthnks.

Other things.

I know I just bought three books (I'll get to that in a bit) but someone really needs to gift me a copy of Indecent: How I Make It and Fake It as a Girl for Hire by Sarah Katherine Lewis because I have a serious girl crush on her. Mainly from the LJ and a fleeting glimpse/near meeting on the bus.

Okay as I'm cruising around Hell Amazon I see this:

For great reviews of books for girls

And as you may guess that immediately rubbed my fucking fur the wrong motherfucking way. What the fuck is a book for a girl? Is it because the book in question (that I'm not even going to link to) is some sort of love story? Or because it's about prostitution? What the LIVING fucking hell.

Something in the recommendations algorithyms in Amazon has gone all fucking wonky again. Awhile back I bought some horror books by black authors and for months I had a spate of fucking "Urban" fiction recs. And I don't know if I discussed here (and don't get me started about that) but I HATE the whole misguided "genre" and it took me forever to purge my list. I don't know how many times I turned to Mike and said something akin to: "Oh NO the Amazons knows I's a negro" or some such.

Don't get upset I was joking. Sorta.

Anyhow since I purchased these books recently:

The Almond: The Sexual Awakening of a Muslim Woman by Nedjma and C. Jane Hunter

The Surrender: An Erotic Memoir by Toni Bentley.

And Plainclothes Naked by Jerry Stahl.

My reccommendations list is overrun with junkie chic and chick lit.


I really wish I had the time/money to spend my time crawling around some of the fabulous local book stores rather than buying from the devil but. That's how it goes no?

One of the things I love about amazon is that you can look at book information. Blurbs and whatnot. Barnes and Noble is seriously lacking in that department I just noticed.

I'm looking at books as I write this to stave off what is probably going to be something rantastic that was spurred by my a.)love of Susan Powter b.)morons on fucking youtube and c.) the F-Word.

Later for that.

Also it's hard to rant while listening to Leonard Cohen.

Very hard. Even though I've had no coffee yet today (makes me a very grunty beasty) and my left knee is banging like it's got the drummer from fucking Sepultura in it.

I find it fairly amazing anyone at all reads this anymore. After the Diary-X meltdown I think I lost a lot of people. Also unfortunately I lost track of a lot of people I really enjoyed reading.

Oh fuck SAKE now I get maudlin?

Okay this entry is put on fucking HOLD until I get some coffee and advil.

Breakfast of motherfucking champions people. After coffee links and things.

Coffee and Advil have been accomplished and I already feel a little better.

So yes, I was about to do some snarking.

There are few things I dislike more than preachy you-must-think-like-me-or-you're-the-enemy style of ism's. Feminism has been a big one for me lately.

Just where the FUCK do people get off telling me how I am suddenly part of the Evil Empire because our views of some things differ? I can't even begin to tell you how many "real" feminists have lambasted and ostracized me because I don't fit the mold of their particular flavor of what it "is to be a feminist".

Why does it bother some women so much that another woman who yes, probably would say proudly that she is equal to any other human being, might like to get a pedicure? Or that she really enjoys sucking cock? Or getting buttfucked? Or getting her eyebrows waxed?

I just cannot understand it.

Strength is found not in assimilation but in diversity. Seriously.

It makes me tired.

I'm so turned off to any sort of solidarity with people right now. A good friend of mine was forcibly outed from a "support" group because she stepped outside the party line. And not in any way that was threatening but, these people mined her journal for ammo.

I've seen all the backhanded bullshit that goes on all int he name of "solidarity"

Well you know what?

Fuck you and the motherfucking horse you rode in on.

I don't need you. My friends don't need you. Matter of fact, why don't you all just have yourselves a circle jerk and call it a fucking day.

Okay I really need to stop before I start frothing about other things.

So yeah.

Busty Rusty and co. hope you're okay.

*SHIMMY* at Pollyland.

Homo out.

Sunday, January 14, 2007


So the Ebola is finally starting to clear enough that I feel mostly human. Mostly.

So while I'm sitting here naked as a jaybird (where the hell does that saying come from anyway?) what I'm thinking is how is it that I have champagne and Oj in the fridge and I'm not drinking mimosas?

Should probably not get drunk.

So instead I just bought myself some make up brushes to use along with my pigments from M.A.C and Fyrinnae. I didn't get full sized full price anything just some samples to play with.

I really need to go underwear shopping note to self.

I think I'm spent brain hurts.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

Ebola like whoa!

I have the flu. And any illness that involves a lot of snot, fever, chills etc is to be called ebola.

So anyway.

My trip to Walgreens has been postponed so I'm cruising the interweb looking at things between breaking out in sweats and chills.

I bought some fantastic lipgloss on LJ. I got this lipgloss in the shade velveteen. Wonderful color it reminds me of one I used to wear years ago. But with a better shinier finish and a lovely scent.

And I also got an Urban Decay fatty eye crayon that they don't make anymore in gray with silver glitter in it. I love the texture, creamy but enough powder to go on nicely.

I should be writing about this in my poor beauty journal. She feels abadoned. But, not now I'm not in the mood.

Moving on.

I think my next target is finding a good dark cherry or blackberry-ish lipstain. I'll probably have to look around quite a bit. I need something darkish and that has staying power through my chronic lipbalm addiction.

I'm leaning towards the Lip Dye from HennaKing.

I also need to pick up a few more brushes to use with my pigments. And I seriously need a kabuki brush to start using my Bare Minerals. I think it'll be easier for me to use those now since my skin is in better condition to start with. Which reminds me since I'm sick anyway I'm going to give myself a treatment later.

I think I might save up for more BPAL as well. Probably some Ars Draconis. And Blood scents. I have Blood Kiss and it smells really good on me. Like gives me a hard on kind of good. I also have Uh Fenris Wolf and Debauchery. Love both of those too but so far Blood Kiss is the big winner.

Weee I just had SUCH a fucking airbubble go through my head.

I just spent way too much time looking at kitty pictures and I think it'stime for nyquil and bed.


Sickly Homo Out.

Friday, January 05, 2007

No really...

The first week of this year has been an odd one. Along with being absolutely fucking drained, I have been elated (got to see my Boy Venus), annoyed, tired, etc.

In a nutshell.

First off, I have decided not to dump Torrid. However, I have discovered that I can't really wear a lot of their clothes anymore. Apparently I'm not exactly the size 14 I thought I was.


The one thing I really really wanted does fit and is fabulous so that makes me happy.

In other news I have a couple of fabulous books on the way courtesy of used booksellers. Two books about sexuality. Both "awakenings" I suppose you could say of different flavours. One about the sexual self discovery of a Muslim woman in North Africa. Written of course under a pseudonym. And another about a womans path to heaven via her asshole.

I think I picked up one more. Uh? Perv by Stahl? Or um? I dunno.

Last night on my way home while waiting for the bus I was roundly entertained by a man who thought on first glance that I was his niece and out WAY past my curfew. He said it was the way I was standing but backed that right up when he got close enough to see my face. I must've had my usual "get the fuck away from me expression" because he stopped and said,

"Goddamn look like you'll slap the black right off of me"

True enough. He then had the goodsense to tell me good evening then, leave me the hell alone.

Smart move.

I was unamused and ready to go home.

Seeing Adam this morning made up for that.

So I'm a member of this hair care forum (haaaaaay girls) and I recently posted then and now photos of my hair. One was from the infamous purple butch cut and one was from earlier this week. When I think about how damaged and sad my hair was prior to cutting it all off I am astounded at how healthy it is now.

It's been difficult for me to figure out what works for me and how to take care of my hair in a way I can manage. Especially when I start to remember when my hair was falling out, the terrible area in the back. All of that. It makes me very glad I've committed to this kind of self care.

The latter is what it is really all about. Of course I want to be pretty but, what it really boils down to is the fact that I have had to learn to keep being nice to myself even when life is putting it's foot in my no no hole.

Earlier I was trolling the interweb and found this "book group for women" in the form of a message board of women reading really, ~really~ crappy books. It made me want to yell. The few women who posted who were reading things that are interesting and more challenging than the last in the Blaze series from Harlequin got no response.


So I'm going to wrap this up. Maybe I will do some self portrature when I get home.

Homo Out.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Grrr...beasty gets ranty. Again.

But before I get ranty lemme just say.

YAY Adam. Getting to spend time with Adam was very fabulous.

Poor baby was half frozen and wet on arrival but recovered and was bolstered by napping and spicy chicken.


Now for the ranty.

I belong to several online communities that are for us poor folks. People living at, on the margin of and below the poverty line for their given locale.

Aside from people with money pretending like being poor is some fabulous lifestyle choice and not an actual economic mother fucking problem, there is one thing that really pisses me off.

When someone asks about budgeting and immediately people start honking their wankers that Oh well you know I only lived on 500$ a month for sooo long and I did soooo well on my budget. Which can be fine. What my problem is when these people (and subsequently other people) don't take into account things like cost of fucking living.

Yes, if you live in Bumfuck nowhere Alabama it is probably entirely possible to live damn well on 500$ a month and have money to spare. Understand that a shitload of people do not pay something like 350$ a month in red. Understand that a shitload of people have utilities that run higher than 10$ a month. Understand that a LOT of people aren't poor for fucking fun.

These are also the people who don't take into account things like children, out of work spouses/SO's, debt that (another one that chaps my ass but I will get to it) they can't repay, transportation, etc. Just don't. Tooting your own wank just to make yourself feel mighty for having "lived through it" does NOT make it okay to then look down on other people.

So this other thing. Credit. I see it ALL the time in a lot of these communities where someone will mention debt, not go into explicit details and then have upmteen people get in their ass about being a "credit abuser" or irresonsible human being.

You know what? Fuck you.

Debt does not automatically mean stupidity or irresonsibility. Don't be a fucking asshole.

There are as many ways to get into debt as there are people on this great big green rock we all live on. Some people get into debt yes because they are stupid, other people simply because they don't know any better while it's happening. Other people lose good jobs, have tragedies happen in their lives, buy cars that get royally fucked up, buy houses that are royally fucked up, have health problems and shitty insurance or worse yet no insurance, have children, move. Any number of things can bring a person into the debtors purgatory.

It makes me so angry to watch these holier than thou jack asses make hard working smart people feel like shit because things went wrong.

Fuck you and the computer you logged in on.

One of the things that if you are in Amerika you should know is that, our econmic system is not set up to get your slice of the Shit Pie. It's just not. I don't want to go into a ton of data research. It's unnecessary. Look around you. This Great Land of Ours is made to reach for the brass ring and get a handfull of shit. The exception in this case does not prove the rule.

Amerika is teat fed on materialism, conusmerism and the all Mighty Dollar. That is the truth of it regardless of whether you're poor and growing up in the hood or rich and growing up in the better hood. We are spoon fed want want want, and when it comes down to absolute need need need, we settle.

I'm not condemning anyone for that because we all do it. We are trained and bred to want the Big Prize at the end of the rainbow when matter of fact i'm willing to be money that 80% of us just really NEED the essentials. A roof over our heads, healthcare, food clothes and a little caring. How many of us forgo those things, if not entirely then subjugate one for another?

How many people do you know who damn near go broke to pay the rent to live in a nice neighborhood where they don't have to worry about getting killed on the way to the Kmart?

How many good hardworking type people do you know who are working themselves into an early grave just to make sure their kids get to go to a school with schoolbooks less than twenty years old?

How many people do you know who suffer health ailments because they can't afford to go to the doctor? Or their credit isn't good enough to go to the dentist to get their teeth fixed? Or the clinic they go to got shut down?

You know these people. Chances are you are these people.

I'm not calling for en masse revolution. What I'm calling for is dignity. One person railing isn't as effective as a population quietly insisting.

It's frustrating because at the root of all these issues are people who (in my estimation) have never had to worry about paying the rent or eating for the week. The people in charge of seeing to it that ALL of Amerika's people are doing okay don't give a shit. And what's worse is that these are the people we've chosen to represent us.

How is it that the state of this government has degenerated into a matter of lesser evils?

How is it that our fabulous bi partisan government now (way too many people feel this way) come down to not what a party stands for but which candidate is going to do the least amount of damage while in office.

Are we fucking serious?

What do we do?

I think the first thing we as Amerikans need to figure out is to mind our own fucking business. As in the following scenerio:

Candidate A runs for Mayor of your town. Seems like a good person, has experience that is relevant, is passionate about making your town a great place to live, has empathy not just for the fuckers footing the bill for the race but, for that guy that sits at the corner store all day begging for beer money. Outset of the campaign you think, hey, Candidate A, you're all right.

Candidate B runs for the same position. Seems okay as well. Maybe a little older or younger, not enough absolute idealogical differences to really sway you. For arguments sake we'll say these two folks are pretty much neck and neck in your mind.

Then the shit starts.

Rumours start to go around that Candidate A may or may not be gay, may or may not have smoked a joint when they were 19 and, OMFG likes to read trashy romance novels.

Candidate B (not to remain unscathed) may or may not be an atheist, may or may not have gotten drunk in college and tbagged/Vbagged (when you put vulva on someone's face and not for pleasure. Yes I just made that up now SHH) someone and OMFG only reads Truman Capote while cavorting around his/her house wearing little more than a bad wig and a pair of clogs.

Now, neither of their political views have changed. None of the qualifications has changed but suddenly it becomes about who's a "better person" or who slings the most shit that sticks.

This Amerika is where I have a fucking problem. Nothing I mentioned above (in the shit slinging area keep up with me now) has anything to do with what kind of mayor that person may or may not be. Someone might secretly like to masturbate while looking at pictures of naked pinky toes but, it is really none of yours (or my) business.


And the drug thing. You know everytime some "important" politico has some enemy who has some fuzzy frat house recollection it always comes up as "a history with drugs". Okay let's be real shall we?

How many "important" Amerikans right this instant, I'm talking CEO's, civic and religious leaders, community leaders have at one point in their lives or another done something like smoke a joint. Do NOT bullshit yourself.

Remember first and foremost my friends that we are all human and not all of us had Straight Edge embedded in our genes or figured from birth on being an "important" public figure. And a lot of us human beings liked to experiment with the illicit substances in our youth. Hell maybe in our middle age.

Does this make someone automatically have some enormous character flaw? Some people would say absolutely. But come on, no matter what your stance on drugs, drinking, premarital sex whatever. Does someone having been a stoner when they were 19, really taint them for life?


Does what someone does in the privacy of their own home on their own time reflect in how well they can do a job?

Be real.


Here's where we come in folks. Do you know how much steam it would take out of any shit slinging campaign if people instead of freaking out over the next big thing, said.

"oh, well I wouldn't do that but he/she is a good (insert whatever here) And it's really none of my business."

En masse people. Seriously. Make an email template that says something to that effect, save it in your inbox and whenever there's big news about what uber importante person did whatever thirty years ago, send it to every news outlet you can think of. Then have your friends and relatives send it.

Think about it.

How awesome would it be to have say a presidential election where there was no time wasted on character assasination where 10 times out of 12 it's over nothing?

How fantastic would it be to go into your voting area of choice and feeling confident in your vote not because candidate A might or might not have sucked more or less cock in his or her day. But, because you truly feel that Candidate A will be an amazing Mayor and make your town a kickass place to live.

The moral of this part of the story is that you and I folks are supposed to be what makes Amerika.

Not all the rest of the bullshit.

So, in closing before I have a fucking aneurysm. Don't be a fucking asshole. Have some sense, behave like a decent human being.

That should be the New Years resolution for Amerika.

Don't Be An Asshole.

Thank you and goodnight I'm fucking spent.

Homo Out.

Monday, January 01, 2007

First day of the rest of um..07

It makes me a little cranky that so much stuff I like is coming out of Asia and the stuff is just not made for short n busty such as myself.

I am getting over it.

Note to self I need a stiff angled eyeshadow brush to try out my new pigment so I don't make a mess. Did I mention that here that I bought my first M.A.C pigment sample? Yes I finally went ahead and did it.

So Ebay is the greatest thing EVAR for folks like me who have M.A.C tastes and Wet N Wild budgets.

My next purchase is probably going to be Urban Decay Primer Potion, well at least a sample on it so see how well it works for the dark skin since NOBODY at that fucking company (Urban Decay not Sephora) could take the two seconds to answer the question I emailed them numerous times. Fuck em.

I'm also considering going ahead and getting some Ben Nye Eyeshadows which are fabulous.

I also need to get myself a how to video from Bare Escentuals so I can use my bare minerals in a better fashion. Hrm. Fuckers.

I also still need a proper kabuki brush. Note to self bid your ASS off on the Ebay for one of those mmkay.

Hot damn almost time to leave work.

So yeah.

This year, I am obsessed with feeling and being fabulous. That is my sort of uh..resolution I suppose.



And no, not fucking Fabulosity a la Ms. Simmons. Screw you lady, you did NOT invent fabulous. Pardon me there, I haven't read the book but everytime I've seen her speak it's made me cringe for various reasons.

So I'm sticking with my drag queenish FABULOUS!

I am SO gay.

Homo Out.

Oh yeah does anyone know if these label things are blogger's version of tags?

Subscribe To My Podcast