Friday, January 05, 2007

No really...

The first week of this year has been an odd one. Along with being absolutely fucking drained, I have been elated (got to see my Boy Venus), annoyed, tired, etc.

In a nutshell.

First off, I have decided not to dump Torrid. However, I have discovered that I can't really wear a lot of their clothes anymore. Apparently I'm not exactly the size 14 I thought I was.

Whatever.

The one thing I really really wanted does fit and is fabulous so that makes me happy.

In other news I have a couple of fabulous books on the way courtesy of used booksellers. Two books about sexuality. Both "awakenings" I suppose you could say of different flavours. One about the sexual self discovery of a Muslim woman in North Africa. Written of course under a pseudonym. And another about a womans path to heaven via her asshole.

I think I picked up one more. Uh? Perv by Stahl? Or um? I dunno.

Last night on my way home while waiting for the bus I was roundly entertained by a man who thought on first glance that I was his niece and out WAY past my curfew. He said it was the way I was standing but backed that right up when he got close enough to see my face. I must've had my usual "get the fuck away from me expression" because he stopped and said,

"Goddamn look like you'll slap the black right off of me"

True enough. He then had the goodsense to tell me good evening then, leave me the hell alone.

Smart move.

I was unamused and ready to go home.

Seeing Adam this morning made up for that.

So I'm a member of this hair care forum (haaaaaay girls) and I recently posted then and now photos of my hair. One was from the infamous purple butch cut and one was from earlier this week. When I think about how damaged and sad my hair was prior to cutting it all off I am astounded at how healthy it is now.

It's been difficult for me to figure out what works for me and how to take care of my hair in a way I can manage. Especially when I start to remember when my hair was falling out, the terrible area in the back. All of that. It makes me very glad I've committed to this kind of self care.

The latter is what it is really all about. Of course I want to be pretty but, what it really boils down to is the fact that I have had to learn to keep being nice to myself even when life is putting it's foot in my no no hole.

Earlier I was trolling the interweb and found this "book group for women" in the form of a message board of women reading really, ~really~ crappy books. It made me want to yell. The few women who posted who were reading things that are interesting and more challenging than the last in the Blaze series from Harlequin got no response.

Ugh.

So I'm going to wrap this up. Maybe I will do some self portrature when I get home.

Homo Out.
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