Friday, February 16, 2007

Ranty beasty

So I've been reading the news which isn't something I spend free time doing generally. A few articles and my take .

The headline from CNN Study: Sex of any kind can harm teens emotionally: So someone has finally figured out that if you talk to your teenagers openly and honestly about sex it might make them feel okay doing it.

For FUCK sake. Are we seriously only just now figuring that out?

I find this quote to be heartening though:

"In contrast, boys' sexuality and sexual behavior is generally accepted," Brady and Halpern-Felsher pointed out. "Parents can play an important role in helping to eliminate this double standard by encouraging respect for women and discouraging the use of derogatory sexual terms."

But come ON it's 2007.

Okay let's be honest here folks. Between us grown ups we know goddamn well (you too parents) that folks young and old like doing things with their parts. They like having them touched, they like touching them. And we all know by now that abstinence only sex education really doesn't work.

What works is giving teenagers the respect they deserve. What works is treating them like sentient human fucking beings and not smaller versions of their parents. What works is giving them the opportunity to learn about and figure out their own personal sexuality without tainting it.

That means STOP fucking molesting kids.
That means STOP fucking with their heads about sexual issues.
That means STOP skirting the issue.

That means tell kids the truth. This is a penis, this is a vagina, this is an anus. You get my drift.

And don't wait until your son is beating off six times a day and feeling guilty about it or your daughter is in the bathroom crying trying to figure out what to do with a tampon. When your child asks where do babies come from that child will let you now when he or she has heard enough. Believe me. Kids are very aware of their own limits if only people would stop fucking with them.

Teach your children to know and understand their bodies before they go crazy with hormones and whatnot.

If you are unable to provide the basic human necessity of education. Take them somewhere or to someone who can. Yes, that means you might have to buck up and go to a clinic. I really don't suggest taking a teenager to your aged family physician who can hardly say vagina much less discuss what to do with one.

I'm not saying hand your kids the Kama Sutra and let them wild.

I'm saying give your children the POWER to make an informed conscious decision. THe best defense against the evils of the world is not dogma and fear. It is power and knowledge.

Imagine this if you will.

Your gay 15 year old son is on a date. His date gets grabby and wants to go barebacking in the park. Your son because of the knowledge and support you've given him looks at his hot piece of ass and says, it's not safe to do it unprotected. If you don't have a condom let's jerk off.

How fucking AWESOME would that be? Your kid, balls out protecting his health and enjoying himself? Don't like that one try this one.

Your 17 year old bisexual vegan daughter is on a date with a heterosexual 19 year old boy. Maybe you're not all into it but, because you know you've taught your daughter well and she is a capable smart young woman you're not worried. Boyfriend gets grabby, starts to tell her all about how he's going to die of blueballs calls her a tease. Your hot ass daughter says: I don't want to have unprotected sex or give you oral sex unprotected. Let's get each other off and go get tested. Or you can fuck off.

YEAH YEAH YEAH. That's YOUR babygirl. Would that not just be amazing?

One more situation for you.

You have a 15/16 year old boy/girl who is not sure if he/she likes girls/boys/anything. Your child feels wierd and out of place because he/she isn't out humping everything that moves like his/her friends might be percieved as doing. THen instead of feeling weird your son/daughter decides to stay a virgin until he/she figures out what is best for her/him.


What I'm saying here people is if nothing else, you tell your children the truth. DOn't put it in a religious context which I know is hard. You can add your beliefs but as we all know just because Mom and Dad believe it little junior might not. Think of it not as promoting wanton sluttery but giving your child armor. And making DAMN sure your baby knows how to work his or her brain.

Okay now. For those who don't have these fabulous dream parents I have links. Hell I have links for you grown ups who aren't quite ready for janesguide yet.

Scarletteen pants down one of the best and most informative sites out there.

OutProud. I love what they say right at the beginning, for queer and questioning youth.

YouthResource another amazing resource. For sexuality, help, health advocacy. Good stuff right here.

Some of you may be wondering why there are such things. The reason is tht a lot of adults just plain suck. And when you're young and scared, you need a place to go. If your parents can't get the job done right there are other people who can.

Okay enough of my ranting for now.

Homo Out.

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