Monday, February 05, 2007

Things you should know.

Go right now and read his hotness Anthony Beal's latest journal entry. No seriously go do it. It'll open in another window and I can wait.

His latest entry makes a find point about how much you may or may not know about the contributions of black people.

I really don't want to comment on that right now I'll save my thoughts on the subject for another entry because there's a lot.

So you're wondering now how do I know such a dashing and wicked man?

Goood question. And Anthony if you read this remind me again how we first got in touch I haven't the faintest idea. But I can tell you other people that he is a fantastic writer. And very charming. You should read his stuff. I command it.

Okay let me digress for a minute. I just saw homosexuality called an "epidemic".

Ye gods.

Not gonna touch that with a ten foot pole seriously.

That just floors me. Seriously.

I really sat here blinking for like two minutes in puzzlement.

Actually no, I changed my mind I will talk about the gayness.

I will talk about myself specifically.

I was not born gay or straight. I was born a quite simply a snuggly little bundle of people love. I recall at a very very young age being equally smitten by my neighbor Wendy as I was with her brother Joel.

I remember my Mom trying to explain to me that no I could not marry someone because he was gay and the idea was just stupid to me. My response was:

"I'll marry him and his boyfriend."

It wasn't until I was about 10 or so did I realize that people were straight or gay. And until I was about 19 or so I thought that being entirely gay or straight was pretty ridiculous honestly. I figured why cut your chances? Then only after several gay men setting me straight did I get it.

Then I wnt through a terrible phase where I was trying very very hard to be either gay or straight. But yeah that didn't work.

It took me about five years or so to become entirely comfortable with the idea that I am in fact the uber bisexual. But I hate that term actually. I prefer the following:

"Will try to bite it if I like it."

Much more charming and true to life. I've also been called pansexual. Since I have enjoyed, loved, lusted after those who aren't strictly male or female. And of course since I said that i"m not thinking of a very hawt tgirl who shall remain nameless but I am thinking of her in all her mile long chocolate colored legs, cute booby glory.

Mmm curvy pouty lips, big dark eyes, long lovely fingers. Oh wait...yeah sorry. Got distracted. You know who you are lovely local lady. I miss you. So I'm totally going to google stalk you to see if I can find you.

Back on topic.

What was I gonna say?

Hot Butches yeah wait no. Okay fuck the theory I am going to share some hotness that I have witnessed recently with mine own eyes.

HAWT butch at Starbuck's a few weeks ago. Probably mid-late 30s, black rimmed kickass glasses, brush cut, natty outfit. I would bet money you are kinky. You've got that "I will bend you over and spank you" kind of vibe.

At that same Starbucks, there is a girl who works there who has the loveliest skin. Maybe a couple shades darker than mine and you are SO freaking cute. Like I want to snorgle you.

I also discovered over the weekend that I still have quite a thing for some muscley (but not huge) type boys. I was watching UFC fighters and hot damn. There were two I just loved. One was this big scary Croation. Mmm yeah. THen these two hot brown tasty bits.

So yeah sorry. I had to share.

Really aesthetically speaking anyhow, I am fairly easy to please and find something hot about most people. People have asked me how I "developed" such a wide beauty standard. I can never answer. I don't remember ever not finding all sorts of people beautiful. It's always been there. I think I'm just a lot more vocal about it now.

Oh and I have to say I have a mad girlcrush on a local author who has bleached hair and very lovely skin. Shhh.

And in unrelated news I am sadly going to have to trim my pubes sometimes soon because the fluff has gotten out of control and is causing some other crotchal area irritation. That makes me a sad beasty.

I still yearn to have a fabulous 70's era style fluffy muff but sadly it is not to be so. I hoped in vain up until I was about 25 that I'd get fluffier and or sport a little more fur but nope.

For those new to the game I'm not much for shaving. I will when I feel like it but really, I enjoy my little bits of fur. And really I don't get hair much at all. It makes me a little sad.

I think I'm going to pain my nails tonight too. The color I'm wearing isn't working for me this week at all. Tomorrow I'm going to endevour to get up early too and maybe do soemthing fancy with my make up.

I am spent. I have to pee again and there is an orange on my desk calling my name. Until tomorrow.

Homo Out.

1 comment:

Always Your Precious Evil... said...

Greetings, Nudiemuse:

Your compliments honor me. As with my every visit to your school of kick-assedness (not a real phrase? What's not a phrase? "Kick-assedness" is SO destined to be my 2007 submission to Webster's Dictionary!), I find that there is much gold to be mined and coveted here (no, I don't refer to the bit about me, although it does cause me to grin) at your blog. My only reason for not ending the preceding sentence with "your blog of sage wisdom" is that I could just as easily have typed "your blog of wise sagacity", and couldn't decide between the two.

Homosexuality an "epidemic", huh? Right. And if it truly were, you can bet the (self)righteous straights in healthcare legislation's positions of power would see that my HMO wouldn't protect me worth a damn.

People-love is all right, though. Now there's an epidemic for which humanity is long overdue. Perhaps someday soon, someone will engineer a way to introduce a strain of it into rhesus monkeys from which we might contract it when some irresponsible git accidentally fails to properly lock a cage and gets his face clawed open by the little darlins...

But I digress. Heck if I can remember how we met, love; isn't there a rather dark-colored goth-themed message board several years in the past whose URL has been lost to posterity? I seem to recall a glimmer of some such thing. Anyway, I'm happy we did meet, and I ought to express this sentiment more regularly.

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