Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Let's get a few things Straight...also known as don't get it fucking twisted.

So I got an email from someone who "cares" and of course this person is a huge fucking douche and my response (my initial one was actually polite) bounced so here we go.

This is not going to be polite. If you're frightened easily you might want to turn your head.

First of all yes, if you've been reading me since the Diary-X days you should have known the following things if you had any fucking reading comprehension skills at all:

  1. I am not straight. I have never been straight and will never be entirely heterosexual. Not a big motherfucking secret. I am the (my favorite term to date) omnisexual will bite that ass if I like it kind of girl.
  2. I curse a lot. Matter of fact it's a fucking art form for me. Not a day goes by that the words mother fucker, cock, cunt, pussy, bitch and whatever combination thereof I deem necessary does not pass my lips. I like to curse. I refuse to say gosh diddly darnit fudging freak shizz. I will say God damn it fucking fuck shit. Because that is exactly what I fucking mean.
  3. If you're new to the club let me fill you in a a few things that although you're a great lover of my writing you seem to not have picked up on. I like porn and have been paid to write it. Very gay nasty ass fucking all singing all dancing perverted kinky extravaganza type complete with knives blood and bondage. I don't care if you don[t like porn fuck off and don't read it.
  4. When I discuss fat, being fat, fat politics I am not doing it for attention nor to justify the size of my fucking ass to you or anyone else. No I don't often post pictures because I don't have a fucking digital camera. Not because I am teh super seekrit internetz fatty. For the record (pay close motherfucking attention here twat) I wear a Torrid Size 12. I don't own a scale and haven't been to the doctor in months so I don't know (nor do I care particularly) how much I fucking weigh. If I was a size 4 or a size 28 my response to the issues around fat politics would be the fucking same. Fuck you.
  5. Don't fucking email me with a fake email address and have the temerity to think that will change anything about me. Fuck off.
All I have to say in conclusion is you sir are a fucking douche. And I use that in the spirit that you are an icky manufactured substances that irritates my fucking vagina.

Ok enough of that.

I am not in the fucking mood for that kind of shit this week I am really not.

In other news I am wearing excellent perfume today that I cannot recall the name of and the label is super faded. I know it's one I got from Fyrinnae but which one? I don't know.

Can we discuss junkfood for a minute? I don't really eat a lot of junk food at all. I rarely eat fast food (although a back of Dick's is just what the doc ordered..whole other issue though) however right now I want a bag of those spicy cheesey Dorito's so bad I could punch someone in the face.

I'm not premenstrual I think eating all of the tasty Vegan soups lately has me lacking in the salty food area. And I rarely salt anything so I think that's what it is. Sadly though I have no tasty cheesy chips so I will probably make popcorn instead.

I'm wearing this cami top today that has a shelf bra in it. Normally I am entirely anti shelf bra. The D Cups of Doom(tm) DO. NOT. WANT. Generally shelf bras are just a no. They give me uniboob and quite frankly if you are above about a mid C cup that is just not fucking cute nor is it comfortable. But this one is constructed in such a way that though it is a touch too small and squeezy my cleavage is like WHOA.

I should take a picture on my webcam when I get home to demonstrate. It is the chubby baby butt type cleavage and I likes it. I also keep sniffing my own cleavage because I dabbed perfume in there and it smells nice.

I'm in a far better mood today. One Hung Low made it through his post operative check up ok. The nurse told him his wound is looking fantastic and that he's doing a good job with wound care and the other irritation in the area is just chafing. Thank ye gods.

I've been so scared and tense it's just not funny at all.

Finances are still very tight but we're surviving and not having to eat crap which is a relief. Hopefully I'll be able to ferret away some monies for books and projects.

It's really rough having some really fantastic creative crafty ideas but no loot to fund supply buying and such. Hopefully this Fall I'll be able to do some.

I also really want to do something for Pride this weekend.

That something does include the serious want to snog random hot people and probably rubs my boobs against a hot 6'7" drag queen (not that I would ever do anything like that o_0) and go dancing at Neighbor's with people from work. (And um whty the FUCK does that place not have a fucking webpage? At least a Myspace that I can find? What kind of homos are they up in there?) Ok wait where was I? Bootyshaking, homos, boobs, Pride oh right-o.

However I am still just exhausted

But, a little partying bootyshaking and probably fag snogging might do me good.

This is yet another time that reminds me I need more homos in my life. I need a gay boyfriend. I miss Mikee. Who else would take me into the mostly boys only leather bar and leave me alone to play with random LeatherBoys and their Daddy? I loved those boys, there is nothing more fun than riding a LeatherBoy like a pony. Except maybe being put in the sling in the corner and dry humped to be shown what it's for. Yeah ok that's better than riding a PonyBoy.

Also I miss another gay boy with whom I spent way too much time making out in seedy mens bathrooms with. Bathrooms, taxis, on his doorstep much to the horror of his neighbor. *Le sigh*

I miss my big gay life.

Maybe once my life settles down into a more comfortable groove I will be able to re immerse myself in homosexuals from the toes up.

Ok I'm done. I want my popcorn right now.

And as the tshirt Boy&Gurl Venus got me, "It's not PMS, it's you."

Homo Out.


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