Friday, November 23, 2007

Tag it and um..yeah.

So I got tagged by the lovely Vesta from DUH not Vesta good lord Ottermatic to do a meme. And since I am finally more well and can function here we go. Long answers where possible.

Seven Things meme. These are the rules:

1. Link to the person’s blog who tagged you.
2. Post these rules on your blog.
3. List seven random and/or weird facts about yourself.
4. Tag seven random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
5. Let each person know that they have been tagged by posting a comment on their blog.


Ok random facts.

1.)I have in fact had an actual Sugar Daddy situation. It was shortly before I started working where I do now and I was just about right smack between 21 and 22 years old. I had a habit of dressing up and taking myself out on little dates. I met him in the bar of the Alexis hotel.

He was tall and quite dapper, silver at the temples. Very much the quintessential sexy older man, very Sean Connery but with a slight bit of a New England twang. He said I drew his attention because it wasn't really the sort of bar he thought to find a young lady alone, muchless drinking 15$ scotch and smoking a good cigar.

We sat in big dark leather club chairs and he bought me my first glass of super fine scotch, and showed me how to properly cut and light a cigar. Even while we were having our drinks he was starring in a semi pornographic chain of thoughts on my behalf. He asked me out to dinner and at the time dating for me mostly just equaled free sex and free meals. So I accepted.

He took me to a nice restaurant and asked the big question over dessert espresso and some fantastic creme brulee, he knew I wasn't a pro working girl but he did in fact want to be my Sugar Daddy for a week. I didn't hesitate and accepted.

The theme of the four days we spent together was talk about books, history, etc. He bought me a really beautiful suit and took me on his arm to some business luncheon thing, he encouraged me on the way to not let his colleagues speak down to me, which of course wasn't an issue. I was having an excellent time. My whole idea at that point was Fuck Pretty Woman, this is way better.

There wasn't actual intercourse amazingly. He did however like him some tig ole bitties and admired them quite a lot. Mostly what he wanted was company and some fun. We did some dancing, a lot of drinking and when we parted at the airport he gave me a very sweet kiss and some cash in the proverbial envelope. However he did include a card with a pretty Georgia O'Keefe flower on it. We never came into contact again but I remember him fondly.

Still with me?

2.) When I was younger and my best friend committed suicide I went very crazy. I did a lot of drugs, I had what most people in religious circles call a crises of faith where I absolutely destroyed my altar, set it on fire then destroyed my spell books, recipes, sacred things. And the one thing that brought me back to my senses was going through a ritual and getting a brand. In my insanity and grief, the only thing that brought me back from the edge was the pain of having half a broken heart was seared into the flesh of my left breast. It was done by my first queer mentor and the first butch dyke I ever fell in love with Daddy Liz and her hippy wife. For the first and to date only time in my life I laid on the floor and howled, I got shitty drunk, I wept while sitting on the curb in the street and then I survived.

I wasn't healed but I was cleansed. I believe that my abandon in my grief probably kept me from becoming addicted to any of the numerous drugs I was ingesting. It was a trial by fire and I lived.

3.) If I know you personally, regardless of anything else I have probably included you in some pornographic tryst in my head. Irrespective of gender and sexual orientation most of my friends have been doing dirty things in my head. I can't help it.

4.) I have a probably evil hatred of chickens and have since I was a child. A story to illustrate:

When I was a little kid my parents and I went to a bbq joint called The Cave Man I think. They had this thing where if you caught one of the chickens that ran around outside you got a free meal. Me, being the literal child I was I spent the whole time there trying to catch a chicken.

I caught a huge chicken and triumphantly carried it up to the counter and the guy came out to congratulate me. However, I thought that I would get to kill and eat the chicken I caught and got irate, then hysterical. I argued for awhile, then started to cry because it was my fucking chicken and I wanted to eat my chicken.

Naturally I was inconsolable and caused such a ruckus the poor guy called the owner who came from home and they felt so bad that I was so upset we got free food there for months. I never ate there again. I also hold grudges. I felt it was misleading advertising and I was not a happy baby Beasty.

5.) I have an epic sweet tooth. The only people with worse sweet teeth I've ever met have been junkies.

6.) I buy books like crackheads buy rock. However given my gift of super frugality I can generally keep myself in at least 2 books a week (how many I tend to read) for less than 30 bucks every two months. I will read anything and I go through differing phases as to my subject matter. Currently I'm on a brutal fiction kick. Also because of my geekery I encourage the rest of you to come join me on Goodreads find me here. Be my friend. I have been unsuccessful thus far in cataloging all the books I've ever read sadly. Everything I've listed are just books in my physical possession or things that have left indelible imprints on my psyche.

7.) Last random fact, um. Uh. I like pie. A lot.

Okay.

What else?

This weekend is all about my hair. I am going to henna my hair for rhe first time I'm really excited.

Not much else in the news aside from I am going to rip apart and remake a cheongasm dress. Make it fetishy and hot.

Uh.

I actually don't have a lot else to say today. I'm really tired because I don't sleep fucking well and uh...yeah.

So yeah.

Homo Out.

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