Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Things that make it better.

I'm kinda stressed out but today while on my way to work I saw lambs in someones backyard. Frolicking muddy little knobby knee'd cuteness of doom lambs.

I laughed outloud on the bus and smooshed my eyes against the window, broke my neck so as not to lose sight of them. Then Dundaaa. Lamby goodness.

I'm also a little depressed today so I am wearing red.

Why am I depressed? It's not the fact that I'm turning 30 I've actually been looking forward to that for five years. No I'm depressed because I've had to cancel the fabulous plans I had due to lack of fundage.

That makes me very sad because what I really wanted to do won't happen again for a year. Let me remind you folks being poor fucking sucks.

What really frustrates me is that I cut out frivolous spending to the point of feeling like an ascetic and I STILL can't fucking afford anything.

I usually don't want other people to give me gifts on my birthday. I really like picking out things myself. So I'm going to wallow in my depression for a bit and show ya'll what I would buy myself for my birthday if I had the fundage.

First:

Magnetic rolelrs 144 pack. No I don't actually need that many I would give half to Cookie but, I would really seriously like to learn to roller set my hair because I think it would be pretty. I just need rollers and to grow some patience to learn how.

Undoing Gender. By Judith Butler.

Basic black pant by Tripp. 12-short.

Black Trip costume corset. Size 0. That is some hot fuckin shit right there.

Black Lurex Keyhole Sweater 2Fer That is hot I've been in love with that since they put it out.

Black ruched 1 shoulder top.

Black Velvet molded cup cami. I have a cotton one of these and just LOVE it. Bastards put it on sale while I'm broke and I know (got told bya buyer) that they are not bringing those back anytime soon.

Demonia Scene-100 Boots I have been lusting after those boots for two goddamn years.

Daisy-13 Black PU Shoes OMFG those are SO cute. New ones. Love them.

Whatever. I'm sure you all get my drift.

So instead I am trying to plan something that is fun, celebratory and very very cheap. Very cheap. if I were smarter I'd just postpone birthday plans to a later date. like next month. I will probably do that.

But it's still sad.

Last year I missed my birthday due to vacation ruining megaflu.

The year before I worked and didn't do anything special.

Godedamn it.

I'm unamused and now I'md one.

Homo Out.
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Monday, February 26, 2007

First off...

How cute is this:




That's me man.

If it was a little chunkier it'd look more like me.

Cuteness.

What else?

Had a nice relaxing weekend. Didn't do much aside from do more offers on Gangster Greed. I'm saving up for some hair stuff and probably a lipglass or two.

I've been sitting here for awhile, playing games and listening to music and singing. I will tell you gentle readers I still hold out hope that one of these days I will open my mouth and find my Big Balls Metal Voice-tm. I'm talking HUGE like I have been posessed by a bevy of metal bands and my ovaries are about to blow up.

*Le sigh*

Someday.

What else?

My hair is SO healthy and hot right now. Hot as in goddamn I have FINALLY figured out what my hair does/does not like. It's nice. Hopefully it'll be shoulder length by the end ofthe year.

Now if I could figure out the whole styling thing life would be copecetic.

Sometimes I feel so self conscious. I know this isn't true but I swear sometimes I'm the only black woman who can't do her own hair. Silly but I feel it. I braid badly, and yeah. I'm good at dying it and that's about it thus far.

And YAY I hear Ms Hotness Hudson won. I could give a damn about the Oscars but that's very cool. Now if Vogue had used photos as hot as I've seen everywhere fucking else, I'd be happy.

I have a serious feeling that the powers that be at Vogue decided that if they ~had~ to use a big girl they'd use pictures less than stunning as an example. Call me crazy but that's how I feel.

And now I think I'm done. I'm all full of tasty red beans and rice goodness and I stink and should bathe.

That's all, feel free to imagine me nekkid and in the tub.

Homo Out.
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Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Bears lookin in my window

The title refers to this article I read on CNN. Bears crack me up when they aren't you know, doing bear things like ripping off faces.

A tip from your citified Nudiemuse, leave the bears the hell alone.

What else?

The weather has been lovely today. Sunny bright and chilly. So I am wearing a favorite outfit. Black knee length slipdress, crepe button up shirt thing, black tights, mary janes. Similarly simple make up, a swoosh of black liquid liner, buttload of mascara. Shiny barely pink lips.

In other news that payper click thing I was nattering about (the gangster greed link at your right) paid the other day. 10$. Some people scoff at that but, that's a weeks worth of coffee, a pack of imported cigarettes, a few feel goods etc. It all helps. I am actually saving it though, I've got more coming this week or next. I am actually saving up for henna to treat my hair with.

I am excited because I don't mind clicking away for goodies.

The next thing I need to save up for is a digital camera of some sort. I don't really need anything fancy but I'd like to start auctioning regularly to make some of the proverbial extra moolahs and I don't have a camera to use. And I refuse to sell stuff without taking photos.

I will also need some plastic tubs for storage.

This year I am getting my fucking hustle on if it kills me goddamn it.

I also think I'm going to seriously sew. I'm a little scare but fuck it.

My birfday is coming up and I've been considering what I want to do to celebrate the big 30 and I'm kind of coming up short.

I could kind of go for some new hair. Braids or something maybe. I don't know.

I'm going to go make more tea and do more clicking. I want henna now.

Homo Out.
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Friday, February 16, 2007

Ranty beasty

So I've been reading the news which isn't something I spend free time doing generally. A few articles and my take .

The headline from CNN Study: Sex of any kind can harm teens emotionally: So someone has finally figured out that if you talk to your teenagers openly and honestly about sex it might make them feel okay doing it.

For FUCK sake. Are we seriously only just now figuring that out?

I find this quote to be heartening though:

"In contrast, boys' sexuality and sexual behavior is generally accepted," Brady and Halpern-Felsher pointed out. "Parents can play an important role in helping to eliminate this double standard by encouraging respect for women and discouraging the use of derogatory sexual terms."


But come ON it's 2007.

Okay let's be honest here folks. Between us grown ups we know goddamn well (you too parents) that folks young and old like doing things with their parts. They like having them touched, they like touching them. And we all know by now that abstinence only sex education really doesn't work.

What works is giving teenagers the respect they deserve. What works is treating them like sentient human fucking beings and not smaller versions of their parents. What works is giving them the opportunity to learn about and figure out their own personal sexuality without tainting it.

That means STOP fucking molesting kids.
That means STOP fucking with their heads about sexual issues.
That means STOP skirting the issue.

That means tell kids the truth. This is a penis, this is a vagina, this is an anus. You get my drift.

And don't wait until your son is beating off six times a day and feeling guilty about it or your daughter is in the bathroom crying trying to figure out what to do with a tampon. When your child asks where do babies come from that child will let you now when he or she has heard enough. Believe me. Kids are very aware of their own limits if only people would stop fucking with them.

Teach your children to know and understand their bodies before they go crazy with hormones and whatnot.

If you are unable to provide the basic human necessity of education. Take them somewhere or to someone who can. Yes, that means you might have to buck up and go to a clinic. I really don't suggest taking a teenager to your aged family physician who can hardly say vagina much less discuss what to do with one.

I'm not saying hand your kids the Kama Sutra and let them wild.

I'm saying give your children the POWER to make an informed conscious decision. THe best defense against the evils of the world is not dogma and fear. It is power and knowledge.

Imagine this if you will.

Your gay 15 year old son is on a date. His date gets grabby and wants to go barebacking in the park. Your son because of the knowledge and support you've given him looks at his hot piece of ass and says, it's not safe to do it unprotected. If you don't have a condom let's jerk off.

How fucking AWESOME would that be? Your kid, balls out protecting his health and enjoying himself? Don't like that one try this one.

Your 17 year old bisexual vegan daughter is on a date with a heterosexual 19 year old boy. Maybe you're not all into it but, because you know you've taught your daughter well and she is a capable smart young woman you're not worried. Boyfriend gets grabby, starts to tell her all about how he's going to die of blueballs calls her a tease. Your hot ass daughter says: I don't want to have unprotected sex or give you oral sex unprotected. Let's get each other off and go get tested. Or you can fuck off.

YEAH YEAH YEAH. That's YOUR babygirl. Would that not just be amazing?

One more situation for you.

You have a 15/16 year old boy/girl who is not sure if he/she likes girls/boys/anything. Your child feels wierd and out of place because he/she isn't out humping everything that moves like his/her friends might be percieved as doing. THen instead of feeling weird your son/daughter decides to stay a virgin until he/she figures out what is best for her/him.

YEAH.

What I'm saying here people is if nothing else, you tell your children the truth. DOn't put it in a religious context which I know is hard. You can add your beliefs but as we all know just because Mom and Dad believe it little junior might not. Think of it not as promoting wanton sluttery but giving your child armor. And making DAMN sure your baby knows how to work his or her brain.

Okay now. For those who don't have these fabulous dream parents I have links. Hell I have links for you grown ups who aren't quite ready for janesguide yet.

Scarletteen pants down one of the best and most informative sites out there.

OutProud. I love what they say right at the beginning, for queer and questioning youth.

YouthResource another amazing resource. For sexuality, help, health advocacy. Good stuff right here.

Some of you may be wondering why there are such things. The reason is tht a lot of adults just plain suck. And when you're young and scared, you need a place to go. If your parents can't get the job done right there are other people who can.

Okay enough of my ranting for now.

Homo Out.
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Thursday, February 15, 2007

Snorgling my way to the top

Okay so my day sttarted out kinda bad. But I got to snortgle an 8 month old great dane. She is so cute and all big and goofy. I wanted to lay on the ground and snorgle her some more but I had to come to work.

I wanted to snorgle the mastiff too but his Mama said that he has been having issues lately and didn't think it was a good idea. But next time I get a mastiff hug. YEAH.

The moratorium on pants and underwear has been called today on account of high winds and me over sleeping.

So as I said yesterday I've been doing the get paid to thing. I spent about a half hour clicking away this morning and made about 4 dollars. Not bad for doing it while reading other things. A few more dollars and I get a payout. Which means that I will have mad money in my paypal account. Which means more goodies.

I'm also doing another one but that payout is monthly so it'll take awhile.

The things I do for a little pocketses change.

So this one is one called Gangster Greed and actually I am expecting to cash out Friday or Saturday. Not bad at all. I made myself some spam email addresses and got myself a free phone number and voila. ALl I really have to do is check the emails, click the confirmations and away I go.

Ugh fuck sake my back hurts like hell today. Nothing like sciatic pain from ass to ankle to make your day.

I think I am going to go investigate some more hustles.

Yes, this year I am getting my hustle on I'm tired of being poor.

That's it.

Homo Out.

And ps..going to put my payper referral links in my sidebar there. Do it or don't.
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Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Be straight in terror.

The title refers to some amusing spam I got today.

Okay I will admit I've been doing one of those pay per click type things and goddamn it. I am so close to a cash out. It's a good deal, not super scammy like everything else on the fucking net. Given that I don't do anything that costs even a dollar (I'm cheap like that) all I've got is pocket change.

But goddamn it I don't get any fucking referrals. Because I don't know a lot of people who do this sort of thing.

Frankly it's a decent way to keep a little money in my paypal account.

I should find one of those referral trade type message boards.

So anyhow it's VD day.

Oh my GOD I just got such a hard on for this motherboard by Asus. It's fucking Intel but goddamn that's hawt.

So right it's VD day and in celebration of all things love I am wearing red. Full length red skirt that was formerly a dress. The boob area was way too small so I did some cutting and wear it with the top part pinned to my bra and voila. Full length swishy and red.

Also in celebration I didn't wear underwear.

Actually tht's a lie I didn't wear underwear because I didn't feel like it.

I have discovered recently that I am really not fond of strangers insisting on talking to me while I'm reading a book and wearing fucking headphones. It's rude. I don't really care that you think this weather sucks. It's fucking Seattle of COURSE it's going to rain. I also don't really care if you can't read the fucking sign on the art museum that says it's reopening in May.

Goddamn it.

Okay enough ire.

Go get yourself some.

Yes you single people too.

Spend some time touching yourself inappropriately. Nobody loves you like you do baby.

I'm gonna drink tea and talk myself out of another bag of popcorn.

Homo Out.
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Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Only in the future.

First of all let me say right now that I am SO in love with Jennifer Hudson it's not even funny.

Gorgeous Voice.
Her skin? Don't even get me started.
Hair is fabulous.
But goddamn that body.

Look at how gorgeous she is:




I mean COME on look at her.

So in looking at LOTS of photos of her I have a similar build except my legs are nowhere near that long and she's a bit slimmer than I am.

Which brings me to point number.

I want to be a bellydancer.

Yeah I know I know you're thinking "yeah you've said that a million times." The main difference is that I want to be performing. Maybe in a troupe within five years.

Five years.

I want to be in something like Hands of Kali. I want to make fabulous costumes. I want to teach other women to belly dance.

Part of my reasoning for this is some self healng. I very firmly believe that finding something to do that makes you feel like a Goddess is much more healing than medication or therapy. I don't want to talk my way to feeling like the wonderful gift of nature that I am. i want to proactively DO it.

So yeah. Until I can afford regular belly dance lessons I am going to write to some local people to see what all they recommend. I'm also going to get into better shape and start doing yoga again.

That is what the plan is goddamn it.

In other pantsless news today I am wearing a full length brown velvet skirt, black wife beater, black textured tights, mary janes, and my black velvet/poly hoody.

I am also wearing the Vanilla Chai perfume I got from Fyrinnae and it is a delicious smell. Not overpowering too sweet vanilla but a lovely spicy mellow vanilla that I find very sexy. I keep sniffing my boobs since I dabbed some in my cleavage.

I also really like how this particular beater fits. The U neckline and the slightly chubby cleavage look is teh hawtness.

For right now though I need to motivate myself to hustle on up to Safeway for a new water bottle. I was going to stop on my way to work but got sidetracked by ya know getting to work on time.

First test calls to make.

Weee prank calling myself FUN.

Homo Out.
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Monday, February 12, 2007

Weeeeeeeeeeeeee....in the lightening.

In case you don't get the reference in the title it's from thisflash thingy at Albino Black Sheep. Been around forever and is still fucking funny.

Okay the world might be ending I'm wearing something with pink on it.

No seriously I swear to Baby Jesus.

I'm wearing a skirt that is striped pink/black/white. Seriously.

And feeling quite sassy thanks to a very cute hipster type girl and her very gay boyfriend stopping me on the sidewalk to proclaim me to be fabulous.

Where I was standing waiting for the bus is was warm and I had my coat off. Aforementioned cuties did the, "love the outfit love the make up you are fucking fabulous"

Other news. Okay so Torrid and I are not breaking up. I emailed them to inquire about a style of cami they carried last summer and got a response from an actual buyer who pointed me to four other ones that they have and clued me in that they are not going to be picked up again. I have placed those on my wishlist for future consideration.

I got my Fyrinnae order and was amazingly happy. I must reiterate my love for their mineral finish powder and now for their perfume as well. As you may or may not recall I am a big BPAL whore. And Fyrinnae's oils are very comparable. I purchased two samples. One called Vanilla Chai and the other called Pharaoh. I'm wearing Pharaoh now and it smells dark and sexy.

It actually reminds me straight out of the bottle of how it smells in that store Gargoyle's in the Udistrict.

Tasty stuff.

What else?

OH Stone Butch Hotness.

So I see this butch fairly often. At least a few times a week on my way to work and today she stopped me to tell me how cute she thinks I am and that if she wasn't 57 and with a wife she'd take me home and fuck the hell out of me.

Of course I giggled like a school girl. She is very dapper and charming and probably fucks like a beast. And we all know I love that in a person.

She gave me a smooch on the cheek and a pat on the butt and sent me on my giggly way.

I have other stuff to say about sex work but I am going to save that for later when I can concentrate. Right now I must eat something or I will fall over from the low blood sugar grrness.

So some FOTD's (fotos of the day)







Eye make up of the day.

Homo Out.
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Saturday, February 10, 2007

ZOMG

I have to share I am ass over tea kettle in love with super bright eye make up all over again.

I'm talking I want BRIGHT.

Neon Pink.

It's like crack it's terrible.

Mmm bright.

And for Pollyland.

A recap about my embargo on wearing pants.

It started with a pair of bondage pants I fell in love with. I bought them and they didn't fit. Cut to four pairs of pants later none of which fit properly despite me knowning my measurements.

So because my body is oddly shaped I have ceased wearing pants for the most part.

Hence me not wearing pants.

I also have called a moratorium on underwear because I can't find any that are comfortable. So while you're walking around day to day let it warm your heart to know that there is one little mean woman not wearing panties.

And one foto of the day taken awhile back.





Yes my camera is shitty it's a beaten webcam. Those are my legs in fishnets and my favorite boots.

I think that's all I'm going to go wash my face.

Homo Out.

And FYI This Mortal Coil's albums are still fucking amazing after what's it been 20 years?
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Friday, February 09, 2007

Stab...eye...now please kthnks

I am having a cluster headache type thing going on in my left eye today. And it's really not making me want to do anything aside from jam a sharp object in my eye.

I've been a sufferer of various types of migraines for most of my life. The kind I have right now isn't a classic cluster headache. More like a migraine and a clusterheadache had babies and are beating said babies to death in my head.

When the eye pain abates that whole side of my head aches dully.

The combination of the two makes me feel kind of suicidal. It's not good for the being sane thing at all.

I have had migraines so bad I really very seriously wanted to die but, it's not one of those thankfully. I remember seeing on I think it was 20/20 years and years ago (probably mid-late eighties) video footage of a man with a migraine who was bashing his head into walls and floors. I remember at the time I was terrified thinking that guy must be insane. Years later I have actually done the same thing.

Being a frequent migraine sufferer is a really shit thing. Times like this I cannt make decent or clear decisions. I feel violent and-

The above was actually from Weds. I am feeling better now and I had to stay home yesterday so as not to want to put my head through a wall.

I slept off hte worst of it so yay.

Things that make a good Friday great.

Someone I see daily taking me aside to ask if I've been sneaking off and getting peels on my face. Said gay boy saying that my face looks "fucking amazing, and like you've been getting peels you bitch." No I haven't gotten a peel. I have been wearing Bare escentuals bare minerals foundation and have mastered using it. So yes, my skin looks like the motherfucking hot sex.

This foundation along with the Mineral Veil type stuff from Fyrinae and hot fucking damn. I've also been taking MSM for a few months and it has improved the tone and look of my skin. I'm really enjoying myself.

Since I've been wearing good make up I've been experimenting with color and things. Today I've got sparkly black all around my eye and gold on the browbone. A lovely cherry scented lipgloss called Carnal on my lips. A nice pinky red.

The embargo on pants continues. I'm wearing a calf length crinkly circle skirt, a black babydoll to with sparklies across the boobs and my new cardigan from Torrid. The cardigan is actually cuter in person. The velvet ties on the front have some sequins on them but not too many. And I got it onsale for 9.99. So no, Torrid and I have not broken up but she is still a fucking bitch since I cannot buy pants there.

I have also found a source for tights that are still a bit pricy but, I'm told the quality makes up for it.

I am considering lifting my embargo on wearing panties. I found some very cute looking microfiber booty short type drawers that might work for me in a non irritating type fashion.

I make no promises. I still hate wearing underwear.

And no I am not wearing any right now.

Does that make you hot?

I thought so.

Okay I think I'm about spent. Time for water and um...maybe a snack of some sort.

Homo Out
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Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Boots for Beasty

Okay so we all know I'm a lil bit of a boot whore.

Target has these:



On fucking sale 17.99$

I think I'm going to have to buy them.

I LOVES boots.

I also would like some rain boots. But those first I think. I need some new all black day wear type boots.

But first I need other stuff. Like I realized I'm on my last week of one of my vitamins. I think I will make some time to go to Walgreens to see if they are carrying them in store. Or Bartell's maybe I dunno.

I also really need to start shopping for something fabulous to wear to SEAF. And break in my bitchboots.

I'll be wearing those around ze house.

And I'm not feeling particularly verbose today so that's all.

Homo Out.
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Monday, February 05, 2007

Things you should know.

Go right now and read his hotness Anthony Beal's latest journal entry. No seriously go do it. It'll open in another window and I can wait.

His latest entry makes a find point about how much you may or may not know about the contributions of black people.

I really don't want to comment on that right now I'll save my thoughts on the subject for another entry because there's a lot.

So you're wondering now how do I know such a dashing and wicked man?

Goood question. And Anthony if you read this remind me again how we first got in touch I haven't the faintest idea. But I can tell you other people that he is a fantastic writer. And very charming. You should read his stuff. I command it.

Okay let me digress for a minute. I just saw homosexuality called an "epidemic".

Ye gods.

Not gonna touch that with a ten foot pole seriously.

That just floors me. Seriously.

I really sat here blinking for like two minutes in puzzlement.

Actually no, I changed my mind I will talk about the gayness.

I will talk about myself specifically.

I was not born gay or straight. I was born a quite simply a snuggly little bundle of people love. I recall at a very very young age being equally smitten by my neighbor Wendy as I was with her brother Joel.

I remember my Mom trying to explain to me that no I could not marry someone because he was gay and the idea was just stupid to me. My response was:

"I'll marry him and his boyfriend."

It wasn't until I was about 10 or so did I realize that people were straight or gay. And until I was about 19 or so I thought that being entirely gay or straight was pretty ridiculous honestly. I figured why cut your chances? Then only after several gay men setting me straight did I get it.

Then I wnt through a terrible phase where I was trying very very hard to be either gay or straight. But yeah that didn't work.

It took me about five years or so to become entirely comfortable with the idea that I am in fact the uber bisexual. But I hate that term actually. I prefer the following:

"Will try to bite it if I like it."

Much more charming and true to life. I've also been called pansexual. Since I have enjoyed, loved, lusted after those who aren't strictly male or female. And of course since I said that i"m not thinking of a very hawt tgirl who shall remain nameless but I am thinking of her in all her mile long chocolate colored legs, cute booby glory.

Mmm curvy pouty lips, big dark eyes, long lovely fingers. Oh wait...yeah sorry. Got distracted. You know who you are lovely local lady. I miss you. So I'm totally going to google stalk you to see if I can find you.

Back on topic.

What was I gonna say?

Hot Butches yeah wait no. Okay fuck the theory I am going to share some hotness that I have witnessed recently with mine own eyes.

HAWT butch at Starbuck's a few weeks ago. Probably mid-late 30s, black rimmed kickass glasses, brush cut, natty outfit. I would bet money you are kinky. You've got that "I will bend you over and spank you" kind of vibe.

At that same Starbucks, there is a girl who works there who has the loveliest skin. Maybe a couple shades darker than mine and you are SO freaking cute. Like I want to snorgle you.

I also discovered over the weekend that I still have quite a thing for some muscley (but not huge) type boys. I was watching UFC fighters and hot damn. There were two I just loved. One was this big scary Croation. Mmm yeah. THen these two hot brown tasty bits.

So yeah sorry. I had to share.

Really aesthetically speaking anyhow, I am fairly easy to please and find something hot about most people. People have asked me how I "developed" such a wide beauty standard. I can never answer. I don't remember ever not finding all sorts of people beautiful. It's always been there. I think I'm just a lot more vocal about it now.

Oh and I have to say I have a mad girlcrush on a local author who has bleached hair and very lovely skin. Shhh.

And in unrelated news I am sadly going to have to trim my pubes sometimes soon because the fluff has gotten out of control and is causing some other crotchal area irritation. That makes me a sad beasty.

I still yearn to have a fabulous 70's era style fluffy muff but sadly it is not to be so. I hoped in vain up until I was about 25 that I'd get fluffier and or sport a little more fur but nope.

For those new to the game I'm not much for shaving. I will when I feel like it but really, I enjoy my little bits of fur. And really I don't get hair much at all. It makes me a little sad.

I think I'm going to pain my nails tonight too. The color I'm wearing isn't working for me this week at all. Tomorrow I'm going to endevour to get up early too and maybe do soemthing fancy with my make up.

I am spent. I have to pee again and there is an orange on my desk calling my name. Until tomorrow.

Homo Out.
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Friday, February 02, 2007

Annoyed.

So because of my embargo on pants I have been wearing the hell out of my tights and realized I need some new ones. 13 fucking dollars for stripey tights. Just because I am of the big legged sort.

That shit annoys me.

Honestly it's not like there's an extra yard of fabric involved here. Maybe an extra inch-inch and a half of stretch.

Yet another example of "well you're fat so fuck you."

In less stabby inducing fashion news my Jane Skirt is a mere 15$ away from being mine. Happy about that.

I still need a petticoat to wear with it but I found them for a reasonable price so that won't be a problem.

Beyond that I suppose I'm all right. In a decent mood. There was an event I wanted to go to tonight but, too far away honestly and it's too shitty out to be cavoriting on the bus and hoping to make it back downtown before the last bus.

Oh goddamn it. I'm working on this uh...thing about a couple of characters a friend of mine and I developed and the beast is almost 30 pages. And right now is distracting me. So off I go.

The beast beckons.

Homo Out.
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Thursday, February 01, 2007

Bus ride tales and sexy shoes.

Today while riding the bus I watched a man watching me out of the corner of my eye. I imagine that behind my big dark glamorous glasses and slight smile he was probably thinking I looked rather content.

Actually I was listening to Slipknot at ear splitting levels and having a very visceral daydream about jumping up and down on the seats, swinging a bat and screaming at the top of my lungs while I brained every living thing within swinging distance. It was quite the little fantasy I had going. Brain matter and scared citizens ahoy.

I didn't do it naturally.

I don't carry a bat.

Anyhow if you see me walking around Seattle with headphones and a little smile, that's probably what I'm thinking.

I have a fantastic migraine brewing that I am attempting to stave off with Advils and caffiene. I also have some fabulous Japanese lobster chip/cracker things that are actually made with shrimp.

Odd but tasty.

For those who don't know me well the above mentioned day dream is something I do fairly often. I think that is probably what's kept me from committing felonious assault. And no, I'm not a violent person. Not overly so anyway. However, I do have a little temper problem and often imagine myself committing bloody acts of retribution to make people pay for their fucking stupidity.

It's really a good thing I'm not armed.

The big difference between me and most criminals is that I have better impulse control.

I am really kind of annoyed right now. I not only punched several holes in my tights with my nails. (How is it that when my nails are very long I have no issue with hosiery, I cut them shorter and BAM holes in motherfucking everything) I also am wearing an old Lane Bryant skirt. It's a lovely skirt, black and white sheerish overlayer with a black underlayer. However there are no anchoring stitches between the two layers. And the way it's cut the overlayer does weird things around my hips and makes the skirt hang a little funny.

So yes the pants are still not happening. Today in addition to the aforementioned skirt I am wearing black tights, black mary janes, a black pseudo corset laced top, with my black velvety hoody over the works to keep me from freezing my tits off.

Yesterday the bottom half o my outfit was hot. A burgundy "prarie" *meaning long a-line with a ruffly hem* skirt, with a black broomstick skirt with embroidery around the hem. I layered the two because the black skirt is SO fucking long. I actually had the waist band pinned to my bra people and it was still ankle length. I folded the drawstring waist band of the burgundy overskirt so you could see the embroidery on the other one. I liked it. I also wore my cream colored big thick longsocks and mary janes. The top of the outfit just did not work and made my torso look weirdly lumpy. Next time I try that I might opt for one of my babydoll style tops.

My face is looking nice. I've mastered using mineral foundation and the sample of mineral finish I got from Fyrinae is marvelous. My skin looks nice and velvety. I could go for a little more sparkle but that's not a must.

Goddamn it I fucking hate Windows 98. For some reason that is entirely beyond me I just lost everything in my taskbar and I wasn't doing anything. Fuck sake.

What an amazing piece of shit. So before I lose this entry entirely I'm going to move desks. Mission accomplished, I even have music going.

And okay, take my goth card RIGHT fucking now I still love that goddamn Sexy/Back song by Justin Timberlake. It makes me a little ashamed.

Speaking of bubble pop I must also admit to the following. That song Dirrty by Christina Aguilara. Still makes me shake my ass. Also still LOVE Pink's first album. Makes me shake my ass. And Pimp Juice by Nelly. I am still convinced that my days would be fourteen times better if that song played everytime I walk in a room.

Someone should make that happen. Right now.

Monk has an interesting bit on the Boston Kink Scene. Things like that make me wonder how much time do police departments in various places spend trying to bust those kinky perverted type people?

I'm left wondering are there special units? Undercover cops getting tied up to bust evil enjoyers of kink? I keep having this fuzzy picture in my head of some big burly cop in full Cop Regalia spanking some chick or boy then slapping on the cuffs for an actual trip downtown rather than say, a figurative one that involves getting a blowjob.

I really question how enforcible laws like that are. How does one go about arresting someone for doing something that might be illegal in the letter of the law but not in the intent? Are you going to waste tax dollars with an arrest and trial etc just to prove someone likes to get beat on, and that they shouldn't?

Amerika, seriously this legislating morality bullshit needs to stop yesterday. It has never worked in the past and does not work now. So lets spend our time doing things like, I dunno arresting killers, muggers, rapists, helping out the community. You know fostering a good relationship between the community and police so instead of people throwing rocks and getting pissed off they come for help and become willing to help out.

I know, I must be crazy.

Okay I think it's time for ginger tea and something else to nosh on.

Goodnight Sally.

Homo Out.
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