Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Of Blurbs and Bastards...

I know I said I was done I lied.

I got the book "I Have Chosen to Stay and Fight " as a birthday gift and started reading it last night.

First off I love Margaret Cho like you people just don't understand. She is smart, hilarious, and superbly talented and I think she's hot. I have since the first time I saw her hollering on HBO I think it was and I laughed so hard I almost wet myself.

Anyway.

I was pissed about this enough to actually write to her.

This book is really good. Very personal. And the blurbs ar fucking stupid. One of them says "murderously funny". Which in a way is true. Yes Ms. Cho is fabulously scathingly hilarious. BUt this book isn't about that. I don't want to give too much away but she talks a lot about activism and racism homophobia etc. This is NOT motherfucking comedy.

I actually came about ( ) close to yelling that on the bus on the way home last night. I was su upset I might actually just take the dust jacket off because it's fucking offensive.

I have to say that this feels to me like yet another pat on the head, isn't she adorable, oh how funny bullshit thing. I have this mental image of these "reviwers" sort of chortling away while reading about racism, nodding because they KNOW what she's saying is true but, "Oh well it's just some Asian chick ranting, isn't that funny". See what I'm getting at here?

I don't really know how else to express how I feel about this.

It's the kind of thing I understand.

Maybe (yes I'm willing to consider this) I'm overreacting because of sme of the condescension I've gotten from people. That pursed lip, wobbly head nod "Oh how nice that you do that" type. Their tone clearly indicates rather than "how nice" "Oh you're black and you write" usually followed up by the ienvitable question about whether I'm writing raps or "slam" poetry.

Shut the fuck up.

It makes me angry when people show their cultural biases without so much as a bat of an eyelash.

Along the same lines here are things I NEVER want to hear again:

"You didn't sound black on the phone."
"WHy do you talk so white?"
"I didn't know black people liked (insert thing here)"
"You are really well spoken." (With the unspoken caveat, "for a black")

Anything near to those themes and you can shut the FUCK up and fuck the FUCK off. I've been hearing it my whole fucking life and I'm 30 years old and fucking over it. Do NOT voice your bigoted opinions to me. Do NOT put your narrow views in my personal space. Do NOT fucking act like it's okay because, "well not you, I mean them." I AM them motherfucking and don't think I don't want to stab you in your motherfucking eye.

If honestly deep down inside you have any trouble believing that a black person can be who I am, I don't care to know you. Black, white whatever. Keep it to yourself. I don't care who you think I should be so as not to make your world view seem fucked up. I don't care.

That said, if you want to speak to me about my experience in life as a bi sexual black woman. If you want to know the road I've been walking ask. We can talk about that all day.

Okay, now I'm actually done. I'm going to make some genmaicha and calm the fuck down.

Homo Out.

PS, I saw the sun and had a conversation with a squirrel.
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Welcome to the Pit Mother Fucker.

Okay so thus far today I've done the following:


  • Almost fell down on 1st avenue.
  • Spritzed myself liberally with very hot water.
  • Almost spilled "black pearl" loose eyeshadow all over my counter.
  • Nearly squirted toner in my eye.
  • Poked said eye with eyeliner.
  • Snotted on myself.
  • Left without my umbrella even though it looks like it will start pissing rain.
  • Worn an entirely cute but non warm outfit.

So yeah. Starting out a winner.

However. The outfit and make up are very good. I'm not loving the shoes but, I haven't yet gotten new summer flats and for once I didn't feel like wearing boots.

Also listening to MurderDolls while getting ready is nice. Yelling "YOU MOTHERFUCKERS MAKE ME WANT TO SLIT MY WRISTS" before noon is probably not a good way to make friends with the neighbors.

Brain is not entirely functional yet. Allergy/back meds kicking my ass.

Fuck it I'm going to listen to blues and drink my cocoa.

Homo Out.


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Monday, March 26, 2007

Oh for FUCK sake.

At the risk of sounding mentrually induced evil I really want the following.

Turkey sammich, wheat, lil bit o mayo, lettuce, tomato, tiny smear of dijon, sweet/spicy chili sauce, sprouts. With a side of very salty french fries and/or salt and peper chips.

And a beer. Preferably a RollingRock. Or maybe even the one with the big titty blonde on the bottle.

Anyhow.

Going to have soup and fucking soda instead.

I am not amused.

IN fact I am unamused.

My back STILL fucking hurts in a crunchy angry way.

In other news um.

I am wearing fabulous make up today. French violet MAC pigment all over my lid and a chartruese pigment cat eye.

Can we talk about hot women for a moment?

Mia Freaking Tyler. I don't think I can express to you people the kind of serious hardon I have for this woman. She is hawt. Biteable. OH. MY> LORD.

I say the following in all solemnity:

"Fat bottomed girls, you make this rockin world go round."

And I might add make me hot in the pants.

WHat else makes me hot in the pants?

BPAL stuff. I want so much of that stuff it is just not funny.

I also want (while I am on the subject...and I should make myself a cat macro while I"m at my wantingness) chrome yellow MAC Pro eyeshadow. I also want a fancy elliptical machine. And some microfiber bootyshort panties. And a gigantic cleavage bra and something to wear said bra with. Dust said ginormous cleavage with glitter and call it a day.

I want high heels.

I want stompy boots.

I want tattoos.

I want synth dreads.

WANT WANT WANT!

I also want a pair of fabulous glasses.

That's all.

Homo Out.

PS...seriously someone please yank out my spine and beat me the rest of the way to death with it. Kthnks bai!
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Thursday, March 22, 2007

Ugh, fat rant and some people are fuckers.

No really.

I am kinda sick.

Actually I feel like stepped in shit.

I wanna go home.

Finances suck again.

And I feel a little ranty.

I have a lot of love for Queen Latifah. A lot. I have since I first heard of her back in the day. I rocked out to U.N.I.T.Y, I watched "Living Single" religiously. Okay I am OG Queen Latifah lover.

That said I am really not happy with her right now.

She announced her new Curvations Clothing line and as I first looked I was so excited. Gorgeous clothes, hot plus size models and then I started checking the prices.

If you look at the website linked in the article yes, her clothing is sexy and beautiful but, very expensive. I saw a one shouldered tshirt top for 68$ or some shit. T shirt material. More than sixty dollars.

Does she not remember what it's like to be poor?

Also her sizing only goes up to a size 22 and I don't like that. The whole thing strikes me as a marketing ploy. Less "I love my fellow big girls" and more "Let's make some fucking loot".

Mind you there's nothing wrong with making money. What I don't like is the faux rah rah I love you guys-ness.

Don't play at fat politics. Don't play at support when in the end we all know it's not about supporting your big booty sisters but, about bilking your big booty sisters for serious money.

I am unamused.

It strikes me as funny that now that I'm actually fairly chubby, and in all actuality right in the middle of "average" for an American woman that now my fat politics rear up all pissed off and whatnot.

I remember when I was actually a fair bit bigger than I am now wanting so badly to lend my help and ear and voice and getting rebuffed many times for "not really fat". Someone actually said those very words to me and I was so hurt. Hurt because despite my vehement support without any creepy "admirerness" or anything I was showed the proverbial door by lots of evil looks and the cold shoulder.

I think that's a big part of why lately I tend to be so reticent around any cause. While yes I might agree and want to champion something at the same time, I don't want to be outcast because I don't fit the mold. For all of my piss and vinegar I am actually very sensitive to that sort of thing. Fat activism wasn't the only place.

LGBT activisim. Yeah. Everything was fine while I had a girlfriend but when I started dating a boy yeah quite suddenly I was persona non grata amongst some of who I thought were my closest friends.

I never understood that mentality. Especially if you are well aware just how passionate of a person someone is and you dismiss them out of hand because they seemingly "break ranks". The fuck kind of shit is that?

However for all my vitriol today I actually did something nice. Which brings me to rant#2.

Be NICE to old people you fucks.

So as I'm getting off the bus today this elderly lady and her "companion" I put that in quotes because he was an asshole. So little old lady in her cute lavender polyester pants and with her cane could hardly get off of the bus and forgot to get a transfer. Even though uber fucker was hollering at her (from about fifteen feet away) to "get your damn transfer". SHe couldn't hear him. Fuck I could hardly hear him over the bus din.

I got her transfer and tucked it into her purse then helped her down out of the bus. She almost tipped over and fell and I put my arm around her waist and helped her to the flat part of the ground while her "companion" stood and tapped his toe. Turns out Miss Lady has very bad balance and "always" has trouble in that spot. She thanked me effusively and tottered to catch up to her "companion".

How hard is it to be nice to and conscious of old people?

I have hollered at more than one person for almost knocking someone down in their haste to get on the bus or off the bus. I would rather be late to where ever I'm going than to stand by and watch someone fall or have some other difficulty. I have more than once helped an older person use their atm/ebt card at the store. Or got them on the right bus.

Is it that hard to wait a goddamn minute?

Same goes for people with small children. Even if you don't like kids, you don't have to be a fucking dick. Let them pass. Or if you see someone struggling w/baby stroller grocers etc offer a hand it's a decent fucking thing to do.

Okay I think I am spent.

I am going to have some ginger tea and try not to stab anyone.

Homo Out.
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Monday, March 19, 2007

I've got a monster in my closet.

The above is a reference to the Gnarls Barkley song.

I actually have a megaton of junk in my closet.

I'm listening to a Drinks with Tony interview with Irvine Welsh. I love his books. I've yet tor ead the latest one though.

Uneventful weekend save for working a lot. Auctions, I got my Amazon Used Book Store up and running again. I've got about 50 books there. From Fifty cents to I think around 9$. I'll be listing a few more here and there.

I'm really hoping to be able to set aside some money after I get paid this week to buy better mailing supplies and set aside a little bit to buy some other books at the thrift store.

I've got a pretty good selection going. Some non fiction, some fiction a few hardbacks in the mix too.

So go forth and shop people Mama needs some new glasses.

Oh before I forget I also got more GA auctions up. WeeBeasty sales.

I"m also considering making a sales LJ for some items I found I can have drop shipped. Decorations, bath stuff other random crap. Probably clothes too at some point if I can get some money aside to buy some stuff from the wholesale clothes place I found.

And I could ostensibly list some Holy Clothing too I think.

Maybe.

I'm undecided as of yet.

ANd Um.

Not much else to share right now. I'm not really in a creative frame of mind. I'm in "Make more money" mind.

The two don't really play nicely together.

HOmo Out.
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Friday, March 16, 2007

Bday is arrived.

Thus far birthday is not too bad.

Mainly beacuse Cookie is such a beautiful and wonderful person I am SO thankful to have as a friend. She wrote this thing that blows my mind.

For me.

And um, I am twittering because BoyVenus and GurlVenus have pressies en transit. Which I LOVE.

I am wearing black and red. My eye make up is fabulous even though the black isn't as dark as I'd like it shows more like gunmetal because of my eyeshadow primer.

I got to watch Ugly Bettylast night which is like my favorite fucking show. America is brilliant. That girl could not be ugly is she tried. And I LOVE Mark (Willie's pet fag) so much I want one of my own. Just not so squealy cause yeah, "too gay" (If you don't watch the show you probably don't get the last bit there.)

And Vanessa Williams, such an America's sweetheart type as such an absolute twat I LOVE LOVE LOVE her size 4 ass. She looks fabulous in the role. Although the fluffy hat in the Xmas episode was a little much even for me.

I am listening to NPR and apparently there are 10 tons of dog poop produced in America in a year. Wow.

And a thing in SF where someone is trying to use dog poop as fuel. I'm all about it. Dinosaur remnants won't last for motherfucking ever no matter how many brown people our president deems it necessary to conquer.

Charles Barkley advocates for gay marriage. This is my predjudice showing but I was absolutely shocked. I think mainlyb ecause of the machismo involved in professional sports to have someone who's a legend in the game (basketball in case you don't know) and (it pains me to have to admit this) a Black man out saying:

"I think if they want to get married, God bless them," Barkley said.
"Gay marriage is probably 1 percent of the population, so it's not like it's
going to be an epidemic. Hey, trust me, I'm never going to kiss you and say,
'Chris, you're sexy.'"


That latter is what I believe to be a repsonse to one of the arguments against gay marriage. THere are people who somehow very seriously believe that if you let gays marry, then all of a sudden EVERYONE will become gay and thus want to get married.

Something I don't see a lot in the media coverage on the issue is the parallel between gay marriage and interracial marriage.

People seem to have forgotten that a mere 40 years ago it was illegal for a white person to marry a black person. Loving v. Virginia Back then (and today depending on who you talk to) people said the same things about interracial marriage that people are saying about gay marriage.

"It's an abomination before God."
"It's unnatural."

To quote Leon Bazile:
Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, Malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And but for the interference with his arrangement there would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.


Substitute man/woman for race and do you hear anything familiar?

The Supreme Court ruled as follows:
Marriage is one of the "basic civil rights of man," fundamental to our very existence and survival.... To deny this fundamental freedom on so unsupportable a basis as the racial classifications embodied in these statutes, classifications so directly subversive of the principle of equality at the heart of the Fourteenth Amendment, is surely to deprive all the State's citizens of liberty without due process of law. The Fourteenth Amendment requires that the freedom of choice to marry not be restricted by invidious racial discriminations. Under our Constitution, the freedom to marry, or not marry, a person of another race resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the State.
/

What part of that do we not get? As a nation what part of "basic civil rights of man" is confusing? Marriage (though many people would argue this point endlessly)is not just a religious institution. Marriage has practical benefits. Important benefits.

Health Insurance
Taxes
Stability
If one partner has died.

Let's look at the latter. I'm going to put you into a situation.

You reader are let's say 45 years old and have been with the same person for 15 years. For one reason or another you've not had support from, contact with or anything to do with your immediate family in let's say almost 30 years. Sadly you have a heart attack and are incapacitated in the hospital.

Now, because you are with someone to whom you are let's say for all intents and purposes married to. Would you rather a.)have that person have the right to handle your affairs or b.) have your family swoop in to do it?

Would you rather go through this say with or without health insurance?

What if you have children and you pass away? Would you want your children taken away from your spouse and given to veritable strangers because that person is not a biological parent?

Would you want your estate snatched up by people you've had nothing to do with for a majority of your adult life?

What if, this person who is your spouse had to make the decision as to whether to continue life support or not? Would you rather it be the person with whom you've shared hearth and home with or people you've not seen have the right to make this decision?

Now think about this. In general no matter what flavor of religion you follow there are edicts that ask that you not judge your fellow humans. That you love your fellow human being. That you as a devout or not so devout (insert religion here) do not maliciously cause harm to other people.

How harmful is it that because you don't agree with something you are potentially putting futures at risk? Or keeping them from leading the happy life they are striving for? Look at yourself in the mirror, if someone walked up to you, a stranger walked up to you and said, I don't like who you seem to be and therefore you cannot do (insert thing here). How would you feel?

Here in Amerika we as Amerkans do not lack morals. What our country is not lacking is backbone. What we are lacking is empathy. What we are lacking is the balls and heart to look at each other and say, "you're different from me and I think it's weird and scary but, I will stand next to you ad fight until you can live as you like without persecution."

We as Amerikans are lacking conviction. We as Amerikans are lacking in the understanding of the phrase "We The People."

What we are lacking as Amerikans is the strength of our numbers.

What we are lacking in Amerika as Amerikans is heart.

I don't care if you're rich, poor, conservative, liberal, Communist, Socialist, Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Pagan, Wiccan, Black, White, Asian, Immigrant, naturalized, whatever.

I don't care if you live in the ghetto or live in the suburbs.

I don't care if you think none of this has an impact on your life.

I have heard too many people say, "well I'm not gay" or "I don't know any gay peope" that is not the fucking point. The point is that you can substitute gay for woman, or man, or Asian, or White, or Black, or Farmer, the subject can and will be replaced. You too can be demonized to the point where you are afraid to live in some places. To the point you have to drive cross country to do something as simple and wonderful as exchange wedding vows with someone you love.

You could have your children taken away.
You could be denied housing.
You could be denied everything.

Granted it's a stretch but, look around you at what Amerika is right now. Our people are halfway across the world getting killed. Our "leaders" bash and torment other nations and yet in this rich rich land we can't (or won't) educate our children. We can't/won't feed our people. We can't/won't do something to make for a healthy populous.

I say "our children" a lot. I don't have children of my own. And a lot of people I know don't either. But as I keep telling people who complain about school levies and the like, those little bastards you hate so much are going to be wiping your ass when you're old. When we are all gumming our peas they will be running rock.

Do you want politicos who can't pass 6th grade math?

No if you're a rational person you don't want under educated people running this country. So shut it and understand that yes, the state of our children does have an impact on you.

In summation, Amerikans stop fucking around. We need to stop pissing on each others shoes and start living like we're all in this shit together.

Okay I'm done.

My birthday rant.

Homo Out.
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Thursday, March 15, 2007

Makin MONIES foo!

So I've been doing auctions and sold two items. YAY.

I also did a new pay per click thing I spent 1 dollar and made 25$. I'm going to do more this weekend and hopefully get another 25$ Next week.

So I'm chipping away puttering up to my 200$ goal.

That's good.

Birthday is tomorrow and I'm working that sucks.

Missing SEAF sucks.

But, I will get work done this weekend. I have auction blurbs written I just have to take photos and measurements and I'll have 4 more auctions up. That's good.

I've also decided to start selling on amazon again. So I'll probably be tossing out a link to my used book store there instead of doing a page myself. It's just easier. Amzon does all the payment stuff etc.

So yeah.

Um I don't really have much more to say right now. Aside from my poetry book is 31 pages down and I probably have another twenty or so pages to add and some newer stuff to transcribe. H opefully I can get that done this weekend.

So yeah homo out.
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Monday, March 12, 2007

Cranky little fucker

So I'm cranky.

On the list of things making me cranky:
Crappy online sellers.
I understand that shit happens. It's happened to me. But if you are going to sell something, and hear from your buyer that it has been a month and the products haven't arrived. I'd think you'd have the common sense to at least answer this persons queries. Not one, cut three. At least say "yeah I sent it and you're shit outta luck homie" or "oh no I didn't send it I'm sorry and it's going out now" or even "fuck off I got yer monies" all while continuing to sell other people shit. It's bad fucking form.

Other things that make me cranky.
My auctions having no bids yet. BUY BUY BUY people goddamn. Mama needs$$.

Other things that make me cranky. That I am not ready for coffee yet since everytime I do when there are still a shitload of people here someone turns it off.

Things that make me not quite as cranky.

The sun is out today and I had some hot cocoa. That makes it a little better I think.

Also my make up looks nice.

Which is good.

My tights are sagging in the crotch already and giving me elephant ankles.

I spent most of my weekend working in one capacity or another. Posting auctions, doing offers etc. Trying to design a used books shop front. Ye gods.

My coding skills are so rusty I wanted to stab myself in the eye. Another skill I've let go to pot. Not that I was all that good at it to begin with but ugh. My mediocre skills have lapsed into TEH suck.

It's hard but I am fairly determined to make enough monies to do the following:

  • Get new glasses
  • Invest in some stuff for my hair.
  • New pair of shoes.

I think that's about all for the next two months. I've decided to take my purchases (big or small at this point) on a bi monthly basis. I'll be needing some vitamins come June so that'll be that month.

If I could pick up some part time work that'd be excellent too.

As of right now all birthday plans are still cancelled. I am SO depressed about not being able to go to SEAF it's not even funny. Even if I could have bought tickets for any of the events, I don't have anything appropriate to wear to any of them. Which was part of the whole damn deal.

Ugh.

And unless things look up considerably we're not going to make it to Convergence either. At tihs rate maybe we'll actually get to do something nice for New Years.

Or maybe I should just stop wanting to do so many things that cost money. I need to pick up an absolutely free hobby or stop hobbying all together and work instead. I just don't know.

It's really not in my nature to live like a monk. Maybe it's a serious personality flaw but I like being able to go out for dinner if I feel like it, or buy myself a lipstick or a book. I like being able to buy people gifts and actually ship them. I would LOVE to be able to afford to get involved with some sort of charity.

It's really frustrating to have all these ideas but no outlet. I want to make clothing, I want to make other crafty stuff. I want to go back to school. I want to DO all these things and just have no way to do any of them. It's frustrating. I hate feeling like I work to absolutely no end whatever save for keeping a roof over my head.

Not that having a roof over my head is to be taken for granted. I don't. I just want to be able to enjoy my life without the strain and constant worry. My biggest wish right now is to have six months of not worrying constantly about bills, maybe a night or day out a month. That's all I really want.

Now I'm going to do some more auction write ups. Look into drop ship items again. Try not to wet myself or have a fucking stroke.


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Saturday, March 10, 2007

Annoyed. Or call it mama needs monies.

So I'm getting some auction shit together and kept getting booted out of my chosen auction site.

Fuck sake.

I needs to makes me some LOOT.

I am trying really hard to drum up some cash for an eye exam.

Tomorrow I'll be taking pictures of stuff. Hopefully this will turn out well and contribute to the Brokeass Beasty fund.

Tonight I'll make some banners. And I'll list the shit until it fucking sells.

Hopefully once I'm a little more liquid I can make thrift store runs for stuff to auction. That would be fabulous.

I'm also working on the elusive poetry anthology. So yeah.

That's all the news that's fit to print.

Except I'd like to share that I have on my "Castro ass sex" pants. Which are jammy pants that have a big fucking split right over my asscrack and I don't care they are comfy.

Homo Out.
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Thursday, March 08, 2007

My ass says no.

So yesterday Monk posted about this evil looking butt toy. Okay I love toys that look very scary. But that thing made my poor wee ass say oh HELLZ no don't even consider it.

I'm talking instant pucker right up and never going to open again kind of instant reaction.

Not that I wouldn't like to watch it being used on someone. Actually I'd like that very much.

Something my sex life is missing in a big way is any way for me to indulge my voyeuristic side. Especially when it comes to kink. I LOVE watching a good scene. I don't even have to know the people although it's better if I do. I'm not entirely a voyeur though, if allowed (and oh how I LOVE being allowed) I have no issue helping.

Although usually my "helping" comes in the form of taunting the bottom, touching welts and scratches. Maybe leaning over for the occasional bite out of a particularly tasty looking heiney.

I have a weakness for a nice butt. I do. Especially a cute nekkid butt. I cannot help myself and when presented with one, I will bite it.

Which reminds me of someone I used to play with on occasion.

I had this Leather Daddy friend who had a whole pack of boys to play with. I met (to protect the depraved I will call him Daddy Baldy.) Daddy Badly at the Timberline years ago prior to their big move and subsequent closing. I met him because I saw him on the dancefloor, all hot burly and shirtless and he had these big gorgeous nipple rings and I wanted to touch them. SO I asked and spent a good part of that night tugging on them, tickling him and leaving kiss prints on his bald head.

So we ran into each other a lot after that and when he found I'm I liked the leather he invited me over to play with him and a couple of his not quite so entirely gay boys.

Good Lord.

Being given the run of his toys and boys I was in all sorts of heaven.

I spent quite a few evenings running around his house in booty shorts, cock and boots tormenting his boys. There was one in particular who had the proverbial badonkadonk. (I love that word by the way). I had the msot fun spanking him, and yes on more than one occasion leaving teeth marks in his cheeks.

I also spent a lot of time watching Daddy Baldy play with his boys. The best thing evar (and the first time I got explicitly invite to come play in a particular scene) he showed me all sorts of interesting things about boyholes that I never knew. He also showed me fun lube techniques and introduced me to the joy of getting a blow job.

I lost contact with Daddy Baldy and for a couple of years asked around about him. Turns out he was rarly if ever kinky in public, didn't really partake in the scene and wound up moving to fucking New York.

:( I was a sad sad beasty.

Something I find interesting about my travels in the kinky world is that a lot of the people I have known, learned from etc have been not in the scene so to speak. Thus, I don't really know anybody in the scene at all. It's a strange thing.

It makes me a little sad. Although I'm not as social as I could be frankly. Having no car and living in the hinterlands of Burien kind of precludes a lot of activities.

Maybe some day. I can hold out hope.

And fantasize about the off chance encounter.

Not much else in the news today sadly. I am kind of tired and my stomach is upset. Cookies were not a good treat today I think. So I'm off to maybe make a pot of coffee and see if I can't scare up something interesting to read.

So yeah. Goodnight.

Homo Out.
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Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Return of the Cute

So I feel cute today. Got financial things straightened out. Well mostly. We're still going to be kind of broke but not too bad.

I also have cute make up going on. Nothing fancy just a good black upper eyelid type thing. Huge lashes. Nude shiny lips.

In sad news after I loved all on my portable music, my fucking headphones broke. Mike can fix them but still I was SO upset about that this morning you have no idea. Iwas NOT excited about that.

In other news my new webcam came yesterday and it takes very good fotos. So not only will there be FOTDs but, I will be able to auction some stuff off. YAY. Get money into my paypal Mama needs an eye exam.

I also want some more Fyrinnae stuff. There colors are really fantastic and sparkly. I think I might try some greens this time. I've got my eye on dragonskin and One Night In Belfast. Probably I'll get some more purples, maybe a burgundy or two. I also want to try their lip shines. Tropical Glow is a nice sheer pink.

And WHY is it again fucking Torrid has a big sale when I have no motherfucking money? I really want some sweaters. They are 9.99 most down from like 70 goddamn dollars.

I still think they have assrape shipping though.

I think I'll also put away some loot for shoe shopping. I need new shoes.

I saw the lambs again today and very clearly in my head heard Hannibal Lector say, "are the lambs still screaming Clarice?" And just barely stopped myself from laughing really loud. And why are there so many kids running around today is there no fucking school?

Getting leered out by barely pubescent boys is not fun for me.

I really need another copy of all of those books. Except maybe this last one I still don't know if I actually want to read it or not. From the reviews I might be very disappointed and that would be really sad.

And what the FUCK is wrong with fucking LJ man? Goddamn it.

Okay my company has some of the dumbest fucking customers. There I said it. They make Baby Jesus cry.

I really need some tea or something now. And to get out of the cross wind blowing across my left eye and making it water. I'm done.

Homo Out.

P.S

I saw the HAWTTEST little baby butch today. I would have enjoyed to have her touching my boobies.

Ok now I'm really done.
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Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Music, springtmie and OMG purple eyeshadow.

So Spring has leapt into being and that makes me relatively happy. My financial snafu is getting straightened out and I got an early birthday present.

But let's talk about music shall we?

Part of my Christmas to self was a Jaton Iroc 1 gb mp3 player. It is hands down the best 35$ I've spent in a damn long time.

I loaded up my wee player with some really really good music this week.

I have decided that Tommy Iommi's album "Iommi" is really good. Of the various guest vocals I have to say that Ian Astbury still has some of the best fuckin pipes in rock.

Also the Billy Idol track makes me seriously want to do evil things to him. Probably involving rope, a beating and some hawt Brown on Blond action.

Mmm.

Sorry got distracted. I wonder if Billy Idol is a moaner or more of a screamer? Don't say grunter that will ruin it for me. Bet he likes it rough.

Oookay back to the topic at hand.

Hot British ass?

No music. Right-O.

Another one of my favorite vocalists is Mike Patton such an odd but lovely voice.

I ~still~ haven't gotten my pigments that I bought a fucking month ago with mad money. I'm really annoyed. But on the upside my eye make up is very nice today. French violet with a sparkly black around the eye for a smoky effect.

I also think very seriously that I might actually shave my legs tonight. I could do with some super excoliation and my skin is looking nice.

Maybe.

I think that's bout it. I need something to drink and quite possibly more aspirins to cut this ache off at the pass.
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Sunday, March 04, 2007

Queerly yours

I've been cruising around the interweb looking at various queer type things and stumbled upon some gems.

Spicy Cauldron Queer pagan poetry etc. Lots of good stuff to look at poking around there. It now lives in my bookmarks.

As a side note am I the only one who has a folder called Homo in their bookmarks?

And for once I wish I lived in LA so I could go see the XXBoys exhibit. And fair warning there is some cocksucking going on there so don't click if you don't wanna see. I love this from the FAQ:

what is the goal of xxboys?

xxboys is here to create positive visibility of the great variety of transboys. to show how different we are, either in our journey, our identities, or our "choices".
xxboys is here to educate by the sharing of experience from an inside perspective, to help people questionning their gender, and to support trans people on their journey.
xxboys also creates a place for sensuality in the trans identity, we fought hard enough for our bodies, it's time to celebrate them


I have loved probably more than my fair share of transfolks and I really think things like this are very important.

I also really want to go to the GLBT Historical Society. I would LOVE to get into the archives. I love that sort of thing.

Oh MAN if I'd seen the Cheer SF back in the day I might've kept up an interest in cheerleading. I love youtube.

S.F. Dyke March from 2002. Very cool to see.

Sometimes I'm really sad not to live somewhere where there's such a huge and fabulous queer community. That isn't to say I don't like my local community but, come on now. How much absolute trouble would I be living in SF?

OMFG watch the Dyke thing, the lady Lea, she very seriously reminds me of this woman I had a MONSTER crush on when I was like 22. I just had an awwwww moment.

There's some hawt butches up in there.

I would get into ALL sorts of trouble at an event like that. Naked draped in girl trouble.

That was fun to watch.

Okay I think I'm spent. I'm all homo'd out.

Yeah.

Homo Out.

Nini.
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Friday, March 02, 2007

Wait it's Friday...WTF?

The last three days have been somewhat of a blur. I'm really tired.

The suddenly very cold weather has my body not very happy. Joints aching sharply. Meh. Makes me feel fucking old.

Work has been broken and broken and more broken. And while I'm this tired it's easily and often overstimulating. Which means I'm an absolute beast by the time I get home.

Linkin Park is playing on the internet radio station I'm listening to and it makes me want to kick something. The safe angst is boring and I want actual angst.

I want to sit and listen to L7. Or Soulfy or something else. Anything really at this point.

I'm glad it's Friday but, it doesn't really help and/or ease any of my ills at this point. Later on I'll probably work on one of the three stories I'm working on these days. Try not to start yelling or weeping. Either is possible at this point I'm so tired and brittle.

The air in here is wreaking havoc with my eyes today even though I took some allergy meds before I got here. My eyes feel dredged in salt and I've only been here for an hour and a half. It's going to be a really long day.

My pants ban has been called on account of very cold and occasionally snowy weather. I'm really not impressed with this Winter into March global warming shit. Give me Spring right now goddamn it. I want warmth or I'm going to go crazy.

Call me callous but i am so more than done with hearing anything about Anna Nicole Smith. Yes it's sad she died. But goddamn it's not newsworthy. It's fucking Jerry Springer with tons of cash. I am so tired of seeing celebrity news on CNN. Stop.

Is it really any wonder why so many celebrities are kinda nuts and whacked out in some way? Seriously leave people the hell alone.

In other news I just made a really good cup of tea and I'm going to go enjoy it now.

I'm too cranky for this today.

Homo Out.
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