Monday, March 17, 2008

Fat Ass Birthday and more.

So my birthday has come and gone.

It was a good one. Uniballer and I went out for a fairly impromptu birthday dinner on Saturday. (Not my actual birthday) We went To the Keg and way overspent but had some tasty tasty food. I wasn't quite sure I was ready for the level of steak they offer so I had the Creole chicken. It was highly tasty and had freaking shrimp and scallops on it. Yum.

I also had one of those foofoo drinks I normally don't like a Forbidden Fruit martini. Tasted ok but I don't care for fruity drinks usually and it was very sweet. I also got a free dessert because my birthday was Sunday and that was nice. Our server was some polite type eye candy and a good time was had. Also they way they serve a Jack and Coke is fucking WIN. You get a little carafe of not quite entirely carbonated Coke and a big heavy glass of jack and ice. You add your own Coke flavor.

That was lovely and we were going to walk home however once we started going we realized that we were both a little more tipsy than we'd thought so we took the bus instead.

Sunday. Sunday was adventuring day and I looked hella cute.

GODDAMN IT note to self- make Uniballer take outfit pictures damn it.

I wore my black Torrid capri pants, a black beater tank, my black hoody and my new black with red athletic striped knee high socks, black sneakers.

First stop was Payless shoes so I could cruise for summer shoes. And holy shit when did Payless get so fucking cool? I could have spent an assload of money. However we did not have an assload so I picked up some very soft rubbery cushioned Airwalk Mary Janes for 9 dollars. Total score.

Also I have developed an unnatural lust for some peep toe wedges. Which moves me onto our next stop Target.

I picked up some clearance ribbed tights for 3 bucks and Uniballer got me a bag of taffy because I freaking love taffy.

So yeah good birthday.

Moving on.

I had an Angry Fat Girl moment in Target.

I was pawing through a freshly put out giant stack of tops and though they were the womens sizes, there were a shitload of XS, S, M and maybe 4 total L, XL. What the fuck are they serious?

As far as fatness goes subjectively I'm on the very small end of fat. Which is something I honestly didn't realize until about two months ago. I found these stats on the intertubes for the size of the average American woman:

Height (inches): 63.8
Weight (pounds): 163
Waist circumference (inches): 36.5

I am 5'3" don't know how much I weight but my waist is about 33.5 or so depending on whether or not I've poo'd that day and how much water I've had.

Emotionally I was skeptical but the fact is no, I am not that fat. It was quite a realization for me, I was operating under an entirely different idea.


Because I have a heaping helping of BDD. Not quite enough to induce agoraphobia but enough. Happily in the last say six years or so it's not been quite so focused on my body shape, size etc. On the crap crusted flip side of that coin I focus on other things that I don't really feel like talking about right now. Suffice it to say I do a lot, a LOT of work on this and it's exhausting.

Anyway. Back to the fat. Has the fact that my eyes are newly open to the fact that I am actually pretty average changed any of my views on fat, fatness etc? No.

Do I still think that the mainstream ideas about fatness are made of fucking fail?

Why yes I do.

So there we go.

What else?

I am soon to be shorning my legs of fur for the first time since um, uh. Uh.

Wow it's been a long time. My legs aren't generally very hairy (photographic evidence later) and quite frankly I could give a shit about some fur. My leg fur is sparse and silky, I'd be more excited about it if it was fluffy but whatever.

I still do not (or super rarely) shave off my pubes. I love my pubes like you don't know. I love them in all their fluffy, bald spot having glory. I do trim on occasion if I'm having sweaty crotch annoyance but mostly I let em run wild. I am proud of my bush. I LOVE my bush.

Goddamn it the thingy I sent Vesta came back smashed and the address label nearly fucking obliterated. What the fuck is going on here?

I also still love boobies and would not be averse to touching some right now that don't belong to me. I am frankly tired of touching my own boobs.


Yes I'm getting random. I'm itchy to go home so I can moisturize and try to cornrow my hair. So yeah I'm done.

Homo Out.

1 comment:

mnwhr said...

Happy belated b-day. I'm new to this blog but I appreciate that you writefrom a sistas point of view.

Subscribe To My Podcast