First I must point you all to the piece that sparked this. Head over to the Rumpus (one of my FAVORITE internets magazines) and read this.
This was written by Roxane Gay and for a minute, when I got to #4 on the list I had an OH SHIT YES moment because I have had that conversation, in fact I had it recently.
It's a variation on a conversation I've had with people my whole life.
"Oh do you know (insert name here) she's black and she's into (insert odd thing here)"
Um...no I actually don't.
There were a few people over at The Rumpus who didn't find Ms. Gay's piece funny, I found it hilarious.
Personally after 32 years of being a Black person in America, honestly at some point you just have to shake your head and laugh. And sometimes laugh quite heartily.
I will tell you something else.
Some of you, this will cause your panties to wad up a little, have patience and pull them out slowly.
Fact is I have heard this kind of unintentional, racism via ignorance type of state from Ultra Liberal type people.
As I was saying to my bestie last night, Seattle is RIPE with it.
The fact is 90% of the time I give back snarky responses to this sort of thing along the lines of Ms. Gay's piece. There is the blank look, the exaggerted patois, occasionally I will say "are you fucking serious?"
Quite often people are baffled and butthurt as to why I may not be nice when they are complimenting my amazing ability to be well spoken.
With the speaking thing my favorite answer to that ever is:
"You know they let us po' negroes read books right?"
Let me explain why these are not compliments, why Black folks do not want to hear this bullshit.
Saying these things is often indicative of the assumption that Black people (or other People of Color) don't normally do whatever it is in your estimation so, this Black person must be super fucking special and awesome.
That is a racist assumption and a racist place to come from even if you "didn't mean it that way".
I'm going to stop there for now. Let that marinate in your brain meats.
I'm also stopping there because I have run out of Educating Negress energy today.
Instead let me tells you internets, I am a little...okay really obsessed with this dress from Eshakti.
Now I would rock that with some stompy boots and stripey or colored tights.
Yes. I. Would.
I started this on Friday and completely forgot to post it because I'm um...awesome.
In other news I'm having some trouble with the essays for the book thingy I've been yammering about putting out.
I have shit tons of notes but I'm not as organized as I'd like to be.
However I have pulled a few older entries here to be gussied up and dropped into the collection. Any requests?
Thus far I've got a couple of essays about sex of course, some stuff about body image, Blackness. You know the stuff I like to talk about here. I'm having a little bit of trouble deciding what I keep to myself for an essay and what I put here.
It's such a weird thing to be thinking about since this isn't like my big publishing break or anything.
But, I really do want to give those of you who want to carry around a little of my brain the chance to. Is that weird?
To tell you the truth I am HUGELY nervous, I put a lot of pressure on myself to make sure I'm giving something from a good and honest place.
But have no fear my darlings, it is happening. I've got my big girl panties and my mother fucking hard hat on. I am ready to do the damn thing.
So for at least the next little while keep your eye here for some randomness, some fatty fashion. And moar sexytimes advice. I seem to recall getting another question or two but I cannot for the life of me find them. I'm a little afraid I deleted them while I was sick and trying to do some cleanup on my database. Also, you'd think I'd have learned from the last time not to do that kind of shit while I'm sick huh?
that is such an awful habit of mine. I find it almost impossible to not be doing something whether that's writing, crocheting, hand sewing things at home.
I've heard this from other working poor folks but, it's hard not to work. I work even when it's really not in my best interest health wise to do so and being that I depend on my paycheck so goddamn much it's really hard not to do.
I am working on that though. I know that if I had rested more instead of going back to work with the quickness I probably would have felt much better much sooner.
So with that I'm off like a slightly limping super hero.
Tomorrow I'm coming with some fatshions. I have been wearing some cute stuff and I wanna talk about it.
And I want to talk about some of my thrifty methods of getting ready for the cold weather and see what you folks have to say.
Also, I don't recall who it was but whomever linked me to the tartan Sugar Brand (I think) boots, I want to grab you, smoosh you and then proceed to smooch all over your face in joy I am fairly certain I am buying those and it is mother fucking win.