I have been feeling kind of emo today, probably partially because of the migraine and partially because well, to be frank because I want pretty shoes but can't get any for a couple of weeks until I get paid again.
Anyway, I was lamenting a little while ago about how I sometimes feel like I am fading into some bland semi version of myself. I don't know what it is that puts me in this mood.
Then I read this guest post over at Always Aroused Girl by a fellow blogger who goes by The Beautiful Kind.
I was enraged.
I quite literally sat here in my chair and said out loud "Oh what the bleeding FUCK is that shit?"
I am outraged on her behalf. I am appalled at the behavior of her former employer because they not only used her private life against her but treated her like all of a sudden because she has a private life that is different from other peoples private lives, they just couldn't employ her anymore.
At which point I say, fuck you.
And then, I realized oh there I am.
There I am.
I am allergic to corporate America.
If I work for you and I do my job well, what I do in my private life is none of your mother fucking business unless I make it so.
I realized when I first starting writing things on the internet that deep down, if you are the kind of employer who would fire me for whatever I say on the internet if you disagree, I don't want to work for you.
I don't want to.
Matter of fact I don't want to have anything to do with you.
I also realized how thankful I am to work in an enviornment where I can fly my freak flag and be a pervy weirdo and it's no big thing.
People I work with have read the erotica I've written, they have seen me with purple hair, they have heard me say whacked out things. I can be who I am both at work and outside of work and on the internet without fear of recrimination.
I am extraordinarily thankful for that.
Do I get frustrated sometimes?
Sometimes I feel like I should be at some mysterious grown up point further ahead of where I am.
So let me officially thank The Beautiful Kind for giving me a nudge and a reminder. And let me also say that I don't know you personally, I don't know if you'll even see this but I am deeply, terribly sorry for what happened to you.
You did not deserve to be treated that way no matter what you wrote or what you like to do on the weekend.
Now for a little open letter to any future employer.
Dear future person looking into Shannon Barber,
Well hi there. I see you have figured out how to use the Googles and let's get it straight. If you decide that you don't want to hire me because of my political views, fat ass, the fact that I like to write porn, I say a lot of bad words, I am a weirdo. I am a Queer weirdo. I am the kind of person who if I don't believe it's your business I'm not going to share my private life with you.
If you are still here, if you don't like what you're reading close the page. Look away go do something else and consider me on my merits as an employee. I will not be held hostage by the fear of being who I am. I did that for a good part of my life and I will not do it again for love nor money.
Okay now I'm going to have a looksy through Walmart.com and round out my wish list-
before I go on I don't want to fucking hear it about walmart. Seriously.
I would MUCH rather be able to buy a good handfull of summer clothing items than just one item. So if you don't need to shop that great for you but do not lecture me about it.
I am also going to work on the closest thing to a manifesto I have ever written and if I am not feeling too shy about it I will post it over the weekend. Hopefully there will be some other posting but we'll have to see.
Now my homies and haters I hope that you can be who you are and not live in fear.
I hope that all of us at some point can go to work, and keep on doing our respective things without fear of what happened to The Beautiful Kind.
I hope everyone takes a minute to look at themselves and say, "Yeah there you are you hot piece of awesome."
(Yes that is required homework)
And I leave you with a macro I made.
Go forth, have a good time and be safe and fabulous doing it.
I love you my homies.