Consider this a continuation of yesterday.
After my entry yesterday I got the ubiquitous anon note all about how becoming a vegetarian would "cure" my obesity, make me live longer, feel better and make me a better person.
If you can't handle discussion about poop, bodily functions, periods, and other things the human body can do in protest skip this one.
So Anon this is for you and for every other jackass that proselytizes vegetarianism or any other dietary choice.
For reference I am speaking entirely from my own experiences. From my body. I am speaking from my body and it would like you to know a few things.
Okay so let's talk specifically about vegetarianism.
I don't think being a vegetarian has a moral value. In the Shannonverse food choices do not equal moral decisions.
They just don't.
If you want to be a vegan or vegetarian fantastic. That is awesome. I would be happy to share some recipes with you.
Me personally? I don't do an all veg diet.
Now I was a vegetarian then later a vegan for quite awhile. I thought as people who enjoy proselytizing these things that being a vegetarian would in fact end all my bodily woes. I would not be fat, I would be super healthy, I would be fucking awesome.
This was not so.
The first issue I had with being a vegetarian was that my already not great immune system started to be even less great. I was born premature and have always been prone to bad airs or if you like I spent a lot of years getting every bug known to fucking man if someone so much as looked at me cross eyed. During the first couple of years as a vegetarian despite making loads of changes to my diet, taking vitamins and doing everything right I got sick way more than I could afford.
My skin started to suffer as well. For me when my body is unhappy it is almost first noticeable in my complexion. My skin all over was far more easily irritated, I broke out constantly and just felt like I was starting to look icky despite my best efforts.
Then after yet another round of months of tweaking my diet, I started getting constantly constipated. I could not poop and when I could poop it was not good.
I value my ability to poop without upset. For years prior to that I'd had easily upset bowels and having a fiber heavy diet did me no favors. Contrary to the popular belief more fiber is not always good.
So along with the constipation came the inevitable cranky because if I can't poop, I get angry.
To recap, two and half or so years into vegetarianism I was yes thinner than I had been in awhile (and thus was encouraged to keep doing what I was doing), my immune system was not holding up, I looked terrible and had a hard time pooping regularly.
If I'd had any sense and hadn't been cowed by the M.D part of my doctors name I would have stopped. I didn't.
I had bought whole heartedly into the idea that if I just tried hard enough and made better choices I could make it work.
So because I was listening to those who preach the word of the vegetable I tried harder. I spent an ungodly amount of money on food because I had to travel to a different area, I had to pay a lot and I still didn't feel good.
Things went along this way. On paper it was all good. I was eating right working out, being by the BMI still heavy for my height but fairly thinnish for how I'm built, but the important thing is my health was declining.
I was developing an iron deficiency. I did what my doctor and fellow vegetarians suggested. I ate more kale, swiss chard etc than anyone should. It didn't help.
Now around the time that when I was on my period and I barely had the energy to work or do anything else I started to come to my senses.
I started allowing myself to be bad. I decided that I could have meat during my period.
I felt better during that time but the rest of the month sucked.
Finally after a particularly bad bout of painful gas, constipation and just feeling wrecked for no good goddamn reason I started to let go of what people (including my fucking doctor) kept saying to me and I thought about it.
Two things happened around this time.
First thing, I started losing my hair because the doctor who had to be fired put me on birth control pills supposedly to help me with my menstrual symptoms.
Second thing, someone explained Occam's Razor to me.
The one big factor during this time was that I was not eating meat regularly. I sat down with a calender and figured out that in the time I had been doing so good with the vegetarian/vegan way of eating I had felt the worst I had ever felt in my life.
I felt better when I ate meat with any regularity.
So I left the fold. Gradually but I left.
I lost a good amount of friends because I "betrayed" them, their ideals and apparently the rules of the universe.
I got called really mean names. People I thought cared about me as an entire being were cruel to me.
Not because I did something awful but because I decided to take charge of my health and well being.
Yes that is what it comes down to.
I'm not an omnivore because anyone approves I eat in a manner that helps keep my body functioning in a manner I like.
And if you cannot accept that fuck you.
No really fuck you because I'm not going to sacrifice my well being emotionally or physically to suit a set of morals I don't even ascribe to.
This is why I cannot believe that anyone who preaches vegetarianism to me without hearing or dismissing my reasons for not being a vegetarian, is in it for my health.
I don't believe you care about my health if you don't you know demonstrate caring for my health.
So you know what Anon, I don't believe you. If you have as you said been reading my blog for "a pretty long time" you would know that I've mentioned this many times. And if you've been reading for a pretty long time and you did in fact care about me and my health, you would not have been such a dick.
I. Don't. Believe. You.
PS in case you didn't catch it, I put some italics in there for things I say are bullshit.